The little things in life

Transformers 3 Dark Of The Moon

2011-06-29T10:11:00.004+08:00

Last night, i was privileged enough to watch the premier of Transformers 3 Dark Of The Moon with 4 friends courtesy of a church friend! Thank you so much!

Lets start off with the trailer here:

I would recommend this movie as Movie of the year, i must say Micheal Bay outdid himself this time round, i can't imagine if watching in 2D was great, what about 3D?
Definitely worth your time and money.

The movie is quite long about two and a half hour excluding all the cinematic trailer!
With a great line up of superstars including veteran actor John Malkovish and Frances McDormand, the old crew; Shia Lebouf, Josh Duhamel, Tyre Gibson and so.
The most funny appearance would be funny asian guy Ken Jeong which really fit his role well just being himself.

The new leading actress Rosie Huntington-Whitely fills in her role well as the girlfriend of Sam but also the Damsel in distress that does play a key-role in the end...Surprisingly! Most of the time, i though she was there for advertorial time, body or beauty but not a key-role, kudos to that.

Overall the story line was great, it followed the textbook of cinematic plot well, not leaving any missing spots or cliche moments too much, leaving a hint here and there with a big BANG of surprises and shocks to keep the viewers going and asking for more.

One little thing that changed the most was the role of Sam, he has been downgraded to playing a much smaller role and most of the time, we were being focused on the war as whole which is great because it is a intergalactic war.

Nothing more can be said about the Sentinel Prime which viewers would look on as a colossal figure of ancient power but only to be left in shock and awe few moments later in along the movie timeline.

One huge change in the movie is the emotional element, it was very well played out by the actors and the Autobots. Micheal Bay and team did a great job getting viewers to connect with the emotions running in the movie, you could understand the situation of the moment and i can say i heard a few sobs here and there in the theater during the emotional moments which is one of the movie's selling point if you asked me.

There was a underlying message which really struck me hard that Sam quoted once or twice in the movie "Do something that means something" or along that line. It got me thinking that sometimes i would want to mean something in someone or my life as well, not just living life as it is but doing something worthwhile to remember, something for the generations to come.

I wouldn't go on much longer and spoil this movie for you but I would definitely urge you to go check it out before time runs out, it would be one of the best movie you have watched this year alone. I would give it a 8 out of 10.

Music, Mind and ImagiNation

2011-06-21T10:17:00.003+08:00

The stresses of life are always coming in on us day in day out wherever we are, whatever we are doing and no matter how hard we try, its just hard to let it go and just get on with life because stress is like a balloon, if you keep filling it up, one day its just going to "Boom!"

How then do we go about trying to let all that air out of our heads and body? Many people would pay big bucks for therapy, yoga, hypnosis, medication, massages, and so much more and i support that, its good to pamper and take up a activity which relaxes the body but how can we go about when money is a issue?

This blogger has been in the workforce for almost 7 months now and the stress amounted can be immense and great, this blogger has to admit he has gone about the wrong way to deal with this stress, when i eventually stumble upon a simple technique that can sooth you in just 10 or 5 mins, just to get through that day.

The technique is called Music Mind Relaxation.
Our minds are great imagination machines to the point where it becomes so real that you can literally touch it and feel it! So harnessing the power of our minds, our imagination and our sensors, this technique will take you for a short journey of our imagi-Nation and come back relaxed.

All you need to do is to first find some relaxing music or nature sounds, here are some links for you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94HYEe1bOFU&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VW0TdN5r4ug&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiVO8yPk-vM

I prefer the beach cause its the best scene to picture in a mind.

Basically, just find any nature spot or sound you would really want to hear on YouTube. Done?

Right now wherever you are, in the office or at home, sit back, get comfortable, clear your mind....now take a deep breath and start the video.

Take off your shoes and socks if you want and just let yourself go into the sound and music,let your mind and imagination bring you to that place.

Feel your body in that place, feel it in your toes and feet all the way up to your body.

Let it flow in your body and feel relax, peace and of sound mind.

enjoy that time and block out the world for that moment, just relax.

As the video finishes, take another deep breath and remember that relaxing trip you had, bring that feeling back with you into the world.

That really worked for me and if it doesn't, don't feel too bad, it takes time to immerse in as your body has to relax and the mind emptied but if all else fails, just go do whatever you like and have fun.

Remember that you can work, produce, perform better and efficiently when you are relaxed and composed.

Have a great week and God Bless.

I Wish

2011-05-10T13:25:00.006+08:00

Star light, star bright,
The first star I see tonight;
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have the wish I wish tonight.

Many of us have heard this famous phrase from Disney cartoons all the way to big movies or even story books but not many of us know that this phrase originated from a science-fiction short story book written by Alferd Bester, called "Star Light, Star Bright" but that is not what i really want to write about.

Its funny that many of us never really know what a word means; A wish in dictionary definition means "A Hope or Desire for something". I know I have made many wishes but many yet to come true, but does that mean all hope is gone?

All i know is that we get into the wishing mood on two occasion; One on our birthday; Two is when we are in a really tight spot and need a way out of it. That one wish that can change everything, that one wish that can change our fate, that one wish that can turn things around, that one wish that can make us happier, that one wish that fulfills our hearts desire, that one wish that can meets our wants, that one wish that we are wishing over and over again.

There are many wishes one can made but its only a fantasy, fairy tale or even a Hollywood life to believe they can come true in a blink of an eye or the star will fly down and grant us that one great wish. I am not saying that wishes don't come true but it gives the heart a hope that somewhere someone out there is hearing out for our wishes and prayer.

At the end of the day, everyone has a wish in their heart, that one glimmer of hope that one day it will come true, that one wish that is so precious, its like a piece of heaven to them. So why wish when we can pray?
For He is our all knowing father and He provides as He wills abundantly.

2 Corinthians 9:8
And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

Mark 11:24
Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

Tired?

2011-05-02T15:46:00.006+08:00

Tired. Tired. Tired. 'How many times have you heard this word?'
or should I ask 'How many times have you heard yourself say it?'

Tired by dictionary definition refers to 'exhausted by exertion'; 'weary or bored.'

Have you ever seen yourself in this state?

I know I have many a times, being in a state of exhaustion, weary about the day, weary about the things to happen, weary about tomorrow, bored of the same old routine, bored of the same old mistakes that keeps repeating itself.

Exhausted + Weary + Bored of life = Tired of life.

We all face this dilemma once in a blue moon of our precious life, its the routine, the momentum of life, the status-quo and the stagnant life that drives us to this state be it one bad situation, work, family, friends, relationships, wealth, spirituality or self.

For me, I am tired that I am only 20 but working like a mule; I am tired that I am 20 and never had a great birthday bash; I am tired that I am 20 and never had a great birthday present; I am tired that I am 20 and still feel neglected amongst a sea of friends; I am tired that I am 20 but nobody appreciates or gives me recognition for the sacrifices I put in my life to make others happy out of a good heart and kindness but finding an empty space in myself because of that. Nobody helps the helper.

Its the tiredness that finally leads us to Give Up!

"I GIVE UP!" Many people, great or small, have uttered these three simple words over and over again in life due to a failure but not knowing that success was just around the corner, just around the bent with a little more push needed.

So I say, even though I am tired of everything that i have written in this post; friends, family, love, life, work, money, education, future, ambition, faith, church; I don't want to give up so easily because success is just around the corner no matter how big or small, it brings clarity, joy, relief and happyness, just to know all my effort, strength and sacrifices bought a little result. It will not be great, it may even suck but "big success begins with a small step of failures and results".

My hope of the day is that tomorrow is always a new day with new opportunities, no matter how tired you are, you are just taking a break, a step back from life to evaluate and then after that, you are going in with a new energy to breakthrough the day.

Just one touch

2011-03-30T15:20:00.002+08:00

Have you ever wonder why people tend to shake hands when they met someone new?

Have you ever wonder why couples always hold each others hand?

Have you ever wonder why babies like to hold their parents hands?

Have you ever wonder why we want to hold hands?

Have you ever wonder why people cling onto hands in desperate and hard times?

Little do we know the power of "Touch" . Its that one little hand shake; that one moment of holdings hands under the beautiful sun and beach that last a romantic memory; that one little touch of hands that spark something in our mind and body. Its that touch that makes us feel connected.

Being humans as we are; Frail, Fragile, Wonderful, Fearfully and Beautifully created, we all need some kind of connection with other fellow human beings neither gender, age, religion nor color, we all feel the need to connect because isolation drives us crazy, it makes us feel like aliens. That's why when we handshake or touch someone in the appropriate places, we get this sort of comfortable connection, our hostility dies off to become hospitality, we welcome that person because amazingly we connect with that touch.

That's why the power of Touch is so powerful, it builds a connection that just defies our logic thinking and chemicals just race through our bodies. When couples hug or hold hands, they feel connected, they feel like they are one with their partner or when a girl makes contact with a guy like a breeze touch, we feel a connection to bond, it is also through that one touch that we feel secure and not alone, the list can go on forever.

Ever wonder how powerful your handshake or touch can be?

Give it a try today, go out and simply shake someone hand. Of course it also wouldn't hurt to give them a smile.

Its all these simple things in life like a smile, touch or a wave of hands that tells someone i acknowledge you; lets talk, connect and develop something here.

Walk With Me

2011-03-26T23:25:00.002+08:00

Love was never on my mind
Till I saw you
Love, I have given up
Till I met you
Love, Was just a word
Till I fell for you

Walk with me
On the beach
We'll leave footprints in the sand
Footprints that will last in memories

Walk with me
In the park
We'll feel the grass and see the blue skies together
Smell and sight that will last in memories

Walk with me
On life's journey
Beauty We'll remember
Ugly we'll forget
Love or hate
Smile or frown
I'll always be there for you
Until we say "I Do" and forevermore

We haven met yet
we haven talk yet
we don't know each other yet

So I'll sing this song
Until the day you'll walk with me

What Happens Next?

2011-03-01T16:34:00.002+08:00

Many a times we don't realize we would come upon a cross road in life, very important transition points in life.

One of which would be our education path and this is the time where we would be making BIG DECISIONS in life on where and what we want to study in the future because that would be our occupation in the end of the day.

Yes it is sometime scary and uncertain to know that we Form 6-ers wouldn't know which Uni we would wind up in and what we would be studying but a time of decision would come when we have to call the shoots and apply by faith that where ever we go, we can make it in there and in life.

After working for two months and gaining more experience than i ever have, i come to realize that at the end of the day, results would get you that far only but it is your characters that determines how far you would go because the working world always demands more than what you can do, its always about getting more and profiting more than what you earn at the end of the day but I have to say, the experience is priceless.

Right now, i would be applying for university soon and where ever i end up, I go with faith and believe that where ever i wind up in, I would give my best and shine as bright as i can in that place because its all in His plans.

The though of Uni to me is liberation and freedom, there we are given the chance to be independent and mature but most of all learn to live out of our comfort zone but most of all, a chance to make new and more friends especially for a single guy like me Hehe "XP"

What Happens Next? Life moves on, so must we.

My Heart For The STPM Students

2011-02-12T17:05:00.003+08:00

This Speech was written solely for the students, brothers, sisters, friends and individual intelligent beings no matter race, religion, status or lifestyle.

WE! My brothers and sisters will soon be upon a most historical moment in our life's, a moment we all have feared, endured and waited patiently for three years, the moment where our true colors of character, strength, intellectual and fruit of our hard labor will be revealed through a little piece of paper, not worth of value in the market but worth more than gold in our sigh, a paper which will determined where we would step foot upon in the near future.

BUT I SAY TO YOU! brothers and sisters, do not fret, worry, panic, or be disturbed by the announcement of our results but give heart because this is only the beginning of a historical, powerful and deciding moment in our life. One piece of paper and a few words written on it won't dictate our true being but only our intellectual as it does not show the true heart and character YOU! MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS have put in to endure and finish the race of the STPM life.

MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS, I only stand here today, not as someone special or different, I only stand here today, as A YOUNG MALAYSIAN ADULT who have endured, suffered, persevered, gain, lost, learn, ignored, marginalized, categorized, tested upon and used in our two years of hardship to enter the promise land, a land flowing of milk and honey, that would bring us higher and richer in life from here on into the future. I only stand here today as common as you and as a human being but most of all as a friend and brother,
no less, no more, who have suffered and ran the race of endeavor.

MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS, let me end my speech quoting the famous four words by MARTIN LUTHER KING and sharing my same passion of that dream.

"I HAVE A DREAM" that one day, there will be no more racial dispute in our nation
That one day, we can all live in harmony without feeling marginalized or ignored
"I HAVE A DREAM" that we would all have a quality education in University
That we would not be ignored of the reward we deserve for our hard work and sacrifice we paid.
"I HAVE A DREAM" that one day, our generation would stand upon the pinnacle of time and history as a generation who made, brought and revolutionize a change in the country.
That one day, MALAYSIA would stand proud of its new generation of young workforce who from our father, their fathers and forefathers fought so hard to bring independence, be proud of the achievement and change in this country.
"I HAVE A DREAM" that my brothers and sisters of this generation would be the tide of change!

A Working Man

2011-01-20T12:15:00.002+08:00

A student wakes up in the morning, sighs at the knowledge of facing school for a day, washes up and putting on his uniform with a sleepy eye and head, taking heavy steps down for breakfast, into the car and off to school. He arrives in school, sit downs in class, takes a few winks after greeting his friends, who joins in the slumber as well, goes for the morning assembly and after that the first bell rings for the start of a new day for him and his friends, having fun in class while trying his best to listen to boring subjects and at the end of the day goes back home to his loving bed and room around lunch time, just in time for another activity in the afternoon. He arrives home for dinner after an exhausting day of school, clubs, sports and a day of socializing with friends, without a worry about money or priorities, he takes his dinner and goes to bed but not before surfing the net, chatting with friends and playing his X-box.
The cycle repeats, with different subjects, different activities and many a new friends to meet.

On the other side of life, 2 years down the road.

A working man wakes up in the morning, washes up, dress up in his attires, neat with tie for the appointments of the day, takes a quick drink for breakfast before walking off to work. He reaches his office, thinking of taking a few quick breaths before starting the day but soon gets bomb down with leftover work and assignments from the day before and new jobs to do for the day. He works very hard to finish the leftover jobs as quick as possible so not to delay the new job too long or else the quota for the day will not be meet, he goes here and there with the speed of lightning, he finishes the old job with only the chance to take a quick deep breath before moving on to the new job. He only has lunch break to look forward to everyday before he is needed in the office again to finish off newer jobs, making the new job he got a first, old and leftover jobs. He arrives home, sweaty, tired, mind filled with priorities, work, family, money, bills and thoughts of tomorrow before eating his dinner and goes to sleep.
The cycle repeats again with a new day, new jobs, old jobs, challenges for the day and weary thoughts.

For those who don't know, i am now currently working part time as client support and operations officer at a training cooperation in atria, its only been two weeks now but work feels like it has been over a month long and now do i truly understand the value of money, how tough it is to even get that sum of money to survive a month, to live for a month. Working life has definitely though me a lot and one of which is to enjoy every single moment i have as a student when i enroll into University, truly none can compare a students life with a working life or vice versa but one things for sure, I learn that working is not so easy as it seems to be and hard work is always needed everyday, your 100% is to be given in that office everyday, if not you wont finish your job fast and on time.

However I am grateful that even though I only hold a spm, stpm and a few co-curriculum certs under my belt that i am able to find a part time job in the office with a reasonable pay. Truly this is God given to mature me once again in life plus learning to be independent and many more which is to come. One of the greatest thing as a christian worker in a non-christian organization is that I learn we work not to please men but to please God, we are always so caught up with pleasing the boss when we forgot the real true master we need to please is God, so no matter what happens at works, we know we have done our best to God and whatever happens is always according to Gods plan.

2 weeks into the job, what are my comments?
I am learning and gaining so much from God, the pay is just a side prize, the real prize is what i gain from this experience and how did I shine as a christian in that work place.

To all my fellow friends working out there, remember to always be who you are and not conform to the pattern of this world.

When God doesn't seem to answer

2011-01-05T23:30:00.002+08:00

Sometimes in my most needed time of answered prayers, God doesn't seem to answer or keeps silent and I learn a lot from this time of silence and prayer.

The first thing we react to the situation is that God does not care, but deep down God is listening every word you pray Loud and Clear, He does not want to make life miserable, He wants you to be filled with joy and be blessed all the time but the prayer we pray sometimes cannot be answered now or God has greater and better plans for you.

God does not answer our prayers not only because He has a better plan for us but sometimes its just a matter of patience and trust in Him, knowing that He will provide in the right time because He guides our path. Even though it seems like God has left you, He never has, He was always there to spur and support you on, its just a matter of your patience and trust because whatever God does is for the greater good of us all.

So i want to encourage all the people out there who feel like giving up on prayer and feel like God has left them, who feel like their prayer are just hot air rising to the sky un-answered, I encourage your to trust in God and keep the faith because in due time we will reap, if we sow patiently.

Reasoning Emotions

2011-01-02T00:06:00.002+08:00

Emotions plays a major role in our life, life without emotions is meaningless to some but for others life without emotions is better off sometimes. No matter how we view emotions, it always take a big control of our life and the way we function about the things especially for the feel-ies. We tend to let it take control or assume our being like a person inside who jumps out and we turn monster or weak, that is why i decided that i should post something i call 'Reasoning Emotions'.

One weakness i have in me is letting my emotions control me and take the better of me, in one instance is pressure and envy. Just the notice or look at friends coupling up together in a relationship instantly triggers the emotional button in me and downward i slide into emotion highway but nevertheless that feeling must be reason with and not linger in it to eat you up bit by bit such as the jealousy monster who slowly bites you around until you are green with envy or jealousy.

Reasoning with emotions is a difficult task because on one hand you are already in this ball of emotions and secondly you have to reason with yourselves as well, however we can never assume ourselves as the weaker half and let emotions take the stronger half of us because we are suppose to be or forcefully take control of our emotions and be logical at those critical times of weakness, addiction or distraction.

Reason with yourself at those times where you feel like letting in those negative emotions and use the logical power to overcome situations which will leave you feeling embarrass or stupid or both, never ever give in to these negative emotions too much, 'a little can go a long way', use a little to better equip and improve yourself.

Always start with the simplest question " Do I have to feel this way?" This question is like the introductory or opening up to yourself, identifying the emotions felt and starting the logical process of reasoning the emotions.

Then we can move onto " Why am i feeling this way?" After kick starting the logical part of ourselves and identifying the emotions, we can move on to the source which triggered the emotions. Knowing the source of one thing is already winning half the battle, the source can tell a lot about yourself and open your eyes to things you never knew about yourselves.

After knowing the source, we must ask ourselves "What triggered it all in the first place?" The source holds many information about the inner part of ourselves, there must be certainly a deep past or a longing in us that triggers these emotions.

Knowing the trigger and trigger-y is essential because now you know what is causing all these hullabaloo and that take us into our next part which is " How can I go about it?" These step mainly involves a solution to your problem or for some a alternative to your existing problem, there can be the simplest step of talking to someone on the same page or a simple prayer. "The power of prayer cannot be looked down on as it says in the bible that it can move mountains and miracles can happen if you have faith!"

That leaves us with one more step in the reasoning process, "What is the proper way of facing it next time?" This step include us taking and making a personal step of not taking in anymore of these negative emotions which might hinder us. A simplest long term solution such as not lingering too long in that problem or going for a simple jog can be used to rid the emotions out of us.

For example, I am pressured by my friends who are in relationship.

1. Do i have to feel this way? "NO"
2. Why am I feeling this way? "I want to experience the feeling as well and I feel left out"
3. What triggered it in the first place? "I tried to be in one but never succeed"
4. How can I go about it? "I should talk to someone about this, do something I like and etc"
5. What is the proper way of facing it? "I shouldn't envy them but congratulate them and wish them the best, I should be patient for the right one to come at the right time"

So there you go, 5 simple steps of reasoning emotions. I hope that this can help those who are sometimes buried deep into the emotional state that they forget the logic side of things and focus too much on the negative and emotional side of things but if all else fails "PRAY AND FOCUS ON GOD" It never hurts to turn to the on who love you the most, shifting your focus on something more important distracts the situation and then slowly help us forget about it.

HAPPY 2011 and a BLESSED ROAD AHEAD!

The Spirit of Giving

2010-12-24T21:31:00.002+08:00

"It is better to give than to receive" Heard that quote before?

Well if you haven, here's one for you but it is not just about the giving and receiving of presents every Christmas every year as we see it sometimes. I for one always have the eagerness of knowing what presents i shall receive every Christmas and sometimes expecting too much of a thing when i forget about the true spirit of Christmas.

Christmas started as the day of our dear saviors birth, the one greatest gift in all our life, Jesus Christ His son, and also the spirit of giving came by when the three wise man came about with myrrh, frankincense and gold for the little babe, that is where we learn from the culture of giving gifts but somehow the real meaning of Christmas can be forgotten.

We tend to forget it is not only a day of giving presents and celebration but a time to remember the one dear savior who gave it all for our salvation and also a time where we remember the love ones beside us all, the sacrifices and precious moments they share with us, the gifts come in as a expression and gesture of love and thanksgiving but one thing that matters the most is the heart.

"A gift is only worth much as the giver itself" We tend to take the giving of presents as a duty and sometimes become a burden in the end and we end up recycling presents, that is just plain wrong unless the presents really comes down from your heart to give to the person and the receiver of the gifts know when you have put in your heart to get them a gift or not, so for once in your life, sacrifice a little of your income to buy nice gifts for your friends and family, this blogger here for one always spends more than rm100 and sometimes close to rm200 to buy gifts for his family and friends and he isn't even working yet, he takes the effort and much help from Gods providence to save up money for the Christmas season.

So in this festive and joyous season, let us take time to thank God for sending His one and only Son for our salvation, the love ones beside us and the life he has given us all each and every day but also lets take time to cultivate the spirit of giving, not just an effort of fulfilling the present quota but giving yourself, your heart and your love for all who have been good to you.

You'll soon realize that giving is not that hard and you learn to appreciate the little things in life but most of all appreciate the true Christmas that begins in your heart

Merry Christmas everybody and a Happy New Year! Lets be in the spirit of giving and thanksgiving!

Woohooo! FREEDOM! ....now what??

2010-12-21T23:35:00.002+08:00

Yes its finally over, the final lap has finish and the results are in. After one full month, sitting for more than 15hours of exam, studying more than i have ever before, i have finally officially finished STPM on Dec 16th 2010, i am now a free man and obtain my well deserved 6 months of holiday.

After all the singing and dancing and jumping for joy! I got stuck with one question...now what?

My first act of freedom was of course my nostalgia which was ok, wasn't really satisfying for me but its worth the fun and friends to remember for life =) was really feeling nostalgic after the party, the two years in form 6, the heart breaks , tears, sweat, blood, emotions, memory, fun, sadness, happyness, wonderful moments and the bonds shared will always remain a special moment in my life, one moment which i am glad i took it full and embraced it to the fullest.

However after all the fun, i was stuck wondering what am i gonna be doing for the 6 months, wouldn't want to be rotting my butt off on the couch all day long, so i took a job for next year, so far still waiting on confirmation but He will guide me to the right place at the right time.

Other than that, i also have to think about what course would i be taking in University and where?? Hmmm Oh bother, and i have only two more weeks to think about it "gasps" but I am sure I will make up my mind by then, its only doubts and insecurity holding me back. By His grace and guiding hands, i am safe.

But one thing that bothers me is that all my friends are off on holiday with their 'partners' which sometimes make you feel quite lonely and wishing for one yourself but i am constantly telling myself that we are called to be set apart from the world, to be patient and wait on the right one and one which we will never regret in the end and one which we learn to be grateful for.

Can't really blog much now cause i have lost m touch already but keep posted for blogs which can share experience, inspiration, entertainment and hopefully guidance for you.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Have you looked in the mirror lately?

2010-11-27T00:14:00.002+08:00

Being a Paramore fan, i really liked their latest album "Brand New Eyes" which have a picture of a wall filled with empty picture frame on the back cover, talk about creativity and perceptions, love it when they do that, but what strike me the most, the one thing that really make the back cover standout was not only the great idea, concept and beauty behind the album, the songs and photography, its the one picture frame in the middle with the mirror which Hayley looks into in the video "Playing God"

It really struck a chord in my mind, it got me thinking.

"Have I/You been looking into the mirror lately?"

Its not just about looking into the mirror and seeing that one look of us in the mirror, the mirror really reflect not just your looks, the mirror shows the soul, the body, the being and all that we are if we look closer. I don't know about you but everytime i look into the mirror, i don't just think about my tidy and cleanliness, i think a lot about myself and where i am, who i am, what i am doing. Guess the mirror is more than just a vanity affair huh?!

What do you think? I don't know about you but i just have something inside that waiting to burst out, its like i want to do something more in my life, i feel i can do so much more, can be so much better, it just wants to reveal all the potentials i have, wanting to achieve my dreams, have you ever have that ache? And then you feel so inspired, so comfortable, so happy, so relax, so enjoyable, so entertained, so amuse, you feel so great about yourself because its just your place of dreams, a place where you can do what you've always want to do. A place where you can be your true self and shining out bright. I always have than burning, that desire, that passion, those great dreams for me and others.

But then it all stops short once reality sets in, the mirror no longer becomes a place of joy but a place of despair and lost hope, you look into it and finally realize, its all just a dream, you've tried it all before, you've put in all the passion and everything just stops short, you look into the mirror once again and realize you've gain none of the dreams you've dream, never done anything you've said you would, never gone the distance even when you've tried.

So "mirror, mirror on the wall; whose that person on the wall?"

" You! A person who is able to reach its dreams and potential, I've seen everything in you, its beautiful and great, now go and live the dream"

An amateur songwriters confession

2010-11-01T22:31:00.003+08:00

With a guitar in hand, a piece of paper on the floor, guitar pick on the ear, mp3 by the side, pen on the other hand, humming to tunes in my head, and a whole lot of thinking, wondering, writing, playing and the process goes full cycle everytime.

Not many will know but i do write songs but as far as i know, i am an amateur maybe even worse but not proven until my songs finally get sung out and recorded. I recently took up this hobby 3 years back when me and some friends formed a band and then since we've been brainstorming for some songs and eventually end up with me thinking a lot of lyrics but not tune. Sadly however the band slowly died off by itself with each band member having to fulfill some responsibilities in life, my heart sank not knowing whether i will ever achieve my first recorded album with a band and at that time it was crucial for my band mates to come up with the tune of the song so i can fill in with the lyrics but back then i have to say "It was not good at all" on my part.

However years passed and i took up the guitar, slowly picking up the chords, sound and music that can be played, opening my mind to the music world and out came a different me, a more alert and creative songwriter with the ability to come up with the basic tunes to bring out the bare essentials for the song HOWEVER! there are more hurdles to overcome.

One confession is that the tune somewhat would have a similarity due to lack of rhythmic creativity and chord knowledge, let it be alone mastering the guitar at a master level. But i never stop to amaze myself, coming out with a tune that actually can be sung. "0OH FINALLY"

Another confession would be that the songs written out must come by inspirations and not by own strength or creativity, a word triggers the purpose and passion, from there on things take flight, but its never a overnight process, it constantly requires changes and innovation to make the song sound good and favorable to the listeners ears.

One last confession i have to say as a amateur songwriter is that there will always be a load of stress and doubts. I quote "An amateur never truly fully understands or know half the time what he is doing, he just goes with the flow, one true character of an amateur" The doubt and stress comes from the uncertainty i have in myself on the songs I've written, i mean who am i with no knowledge of chords or rhythm or rhyme or musical creativity to come up with songs that people will like but at the end of the day the dream of having my first album and looking on at other bands and how they made it from scratch drives me on to complete my first album :)

What is your perspective of life?

2010-10-10T21:40:00.002+08:00

I Like a post on facebook that i stumbled upon today, it wrote and I quote

" When we are single, all you see are happy couples;
When we are committed, all we see are happy singles"

Such a truth in this quote and i was just thinking about it when most of the day i would stumbled upon people and friends who just like to announce to the world of their relationship and post up all the great things about it, then there sat me the single man thinking about all my friends who are coupled and how wonderful the life they have being in love but nevertheless being normal humans that we are we always forget to "look both ways"

After contemplating, fantasizing and remembering past experiences, somewhat this two simple lines just pops out like in front of my face and gives me a wake up call, reminding me to be contempt with where i am, the condition i am in and the life i am living now, not neglecting the life we can live out now and feeling disappointed over not having a relationship, many writers would see love as suffering and pain but lets not let that emotion take too much of us and love out loud and let it come our way. Don't chase after false illusions.

Nevertheless one must remember that life is short and days are getting longer, burdens getting more and the world turning upside down as it is. The challenge we face daily is to always move up the ladder of life, we are never satisfied with what we have or where we are thus making us always wanting the next level, but when we reach that next level, we want so more. One moment we are single, we want to get coupled; when we are coupled, we want to get married; When we are married, we want children; when we have children, you cant wait to see them off; In the end you forget to enjoy every moment of the journey and all you remember was wanting to move on, always moving on, that is all.

I've learn very well from my mentors and friends that "One must learn to enjoy the moment where he is before moving to another moment, this way he truly embraces the moment" and it always took the hard way for me to learn things but in the end it was worth the tears and heartache to grow and mature. Think about where you are today, rethink what your perspective of your life is now and go out there and embrace every moment you have cause the next thing we are standing on heavens gate.

My friends, as a youth, we are all full of zeal, passion and energy, we always strive for more in life, we always strive to move forward, which is good but use it to further excel the state which you are in and when you move on to another level in life, you would look back and said i have never wasted any moment nor regret leaving that moment. I pray that our days would be filled with joy and happiness that you can embrace and enjoy, I pray for patience in life and contempt of what we have, but most of all may our life be one lived out loud and to the fullest.

What is your perspective of life?

Success

2010-09-22T20:56:00.005+08:00

Today at the gym, I met a normal gym goer, we've been talking for sometime just that i never knew him in detailed and i found out that he is handsome, got a job, got a great body, got a good life, got a fiance, well the way i see it is that he is successful.I have to admit i was envious, he had enough for his whole life, went to college, got a job, got a girl, got the looks, got the body but I would've never know how far it took him to get to where he is but one things for sure is that he didn't have to endure Form 6 even this dude which was i thought was smart said form 6 is tough and he wish me all the best in getting in the local u, that proves just how much work and effort is needed for form 6 but would it be any easier in college? I'll never know.

Back to the topic on about success, I had in my mind one word when i was talking to my new found friend "SUCCESS!" yes that one word which Dexter would yell out at the top of his lungs when his invention worked in the cartoon. Then it got me thinking and weighing the options in my life, whether i can achieve what my friend had, somehow he sort of shaped out what i would want to achieve when i start working which i think would not be any different than any eager young blood. Yet how do we weight success? Is there any criteria to concluded whether one is success or not?

Success can never be categorized as a whole, we can never say we are success in a whole, every person has a "blocking wall" in life but success comes out of not only what we posses, not only what we achieve, not how many figure we have in our bank, not many kids we have, not only the job we hold but the way we are living out our life. Why would i say my friend is success, well materially he has enough but he might think otherwise, maybe he has not achieve the job he wants. So success is based in the way you are living and how you perceive success as

It can be merely based on material gaining, you have the "5C's" the criteria which many would set for their partner! CASH! CAR! CONDO! CREDIT CARD! well i can remember 4C's! Many people would view this needless to say this blogger as well. When we get our first car, our first pay, our first salary, our first spending, we feel the surge of satisfaction or as we call "Success" when we finally posses what we want, when we want and with our own money. Some people get it easy, they have their parents to buy for them but this blogger does not have that privilege of getting everything he wants, there is a limit to getting what i want but parents do feed us and always take care of us, no harm trying to ask but be careful what you wish for.

Success can only be measured in our achievements, something in life we work hard to gain, get it, win it and we feel the glory behind it all, feeling the success of achieving the goal we set. The harsh reality is that not all things go as plan but give your best and we will never go wrong.

Nevertheless, "success" is a really big word and it is a big big world out there, at one point we would reach a age where we would start working, start planning out the big life we have ahead but this the way i see it, success doesn't comes from short cuts but from giving it your best, when you work the best you can, success follows along. Success comes with the benefits of enjoyment and pleasure in life but it always comes with hard work, planning and opportunity in life.

So are you success in life? Yes or no, living out your life daily is already a success!

Remembering Happy, My best friend :)

2010-09-15T21:42:00.003+08:00

Today i stumbled upon the movie "Marley and me" The movie really touched my heart and remind me of my own Dalmatian dog whom also passed away of old age. He was with me for more than 10years, from the day i enter high school to the day i left to further my study, he was always there and i really loved what Owen Wilson said at the end of the movie.

A dog don't care if you're rich or poor, clever, dull, smart or dumb...give him your heart and he'll give you his."
"How many people can you say that about?"
"How many people can make you feel rare and pure and special?"
"How many people can make you feel extraordinary?"

Truly whatever was said in those lines is true to the day Happy left this world for a better place, He never ever made me feel any pain at all when i come home, just the sight of him when i come home really puts a smile on my face, he was always there to cheer me up when i was down, he was always there for pats, hugs and kisses. I just wished I could have given him more, given him a better life, given him much more before he left, loved him more and show him that i love him too.

Dear Happy,
I know you are up there in heaven, a better place than here. I never got to say "I love you and i am sorry for all the pain i caused to you, I never got to say how special you are to me, how great of a friend you are to me and you will always be in my heart" Till the day we meet in heaven, you will always be right next to my heart and i will never forget you. Thank you for making my days so much better, thank you for showing love when none cared, thank you for everything. Truly you are my best friend. Rest in peace Happy and i will meet you there one day. I love you.

Pushing On!

2010-09-13T21:14:00.002+08:00

Today i had the "privilege", actually i would not say that after considering how many times i have been in this state. Most if not many will know when i say "B.R.E.A.King P.O.I.N.T" I am sure you would understand that state which we are in when we just cant handle the stress or the pressure anymore.

That was what i felt today and finally realize it after such a long time and many times of experiencing it, and the first thing that went through my mind was " I WANT OUT! I WANT TO QUIT!" No more gym, no more weights, no more cardio, no more running, no more cycling, no more pain staking exercises, no more! and it happens when we're half way there, when we're at the last few moments and we just don't see it, all we see and feel is the disappointment and pain.

That was only the point when everything just starts to flood in, emotions start to flare and anything and everything negative, you think about it and forget about all the good things, it is common when we are in that point. That is how athletes, professional sportsman, or even a normal guy or girl would feel once in a while, we all have our breaking points no matter how tough we are.

That is why we can never question the way a drill sergeant, a coach or even a teacher teaches their players or students, they nag,nag,nag,nag,nag and oh yeah NAG so more to the point where you feel like fighting back or want out but they do it for a reason, they don't just do it because they like it, OK giving the doubt of the benefit, some do but those are psychos, a little bit not right in their thinking machine.

So what is the reason for their constant yelling and degrading, they just keep on ranting how much you suck and how much you are a loser but they do it because they want to train your mental strength because when you are in a competition, exam, or even at your breaking point, your mind becomes the main playground, you would be constantly questioning yourself, you would be thinking of excuses to quit and that's when you're suppose to say "NO! I AM PUSHING ON!" You need to just push yourself and you realize by the end of the day, you did it with all you can with the best you can even though at that point it really sucks to be pushing on especially when you are pushing yourself.

That is when all the yelling and degrading insults that your dear dear Dear trainers and teachers come in hand, their insults and yelling teaches you to push yourself on because in a training you have to train even when they are shouting their lungs out, that is when sub-consciously your mind is being train to push and force your way through, not only that your body kick in with hormones and pumps the chemicals you need to push it on.

Here is my own account, i was in the gym doing a new set of exercises involving high repetitions and it was really tiring and killing me to the point where i wanted to quit, i just did not want to come to the gym anymore, i just wanted out but i told myself to just finish it, i did and it made me feel good about myself because i am one step closer to achieving a long term goal and whatever I've endure would be useful in the near future or even sooner.

Dear friends, i pray that God will give you the strength and hope you need to carry on and push on to the end of the line or even the end of the day wherever you are whatever your doing, if you feel like no one believes you or no one cares about you, I do even if i don't know you because i believe that no matter how hard it is, you can do it and become the champion that you are and a little prayer goes a long way. God bless you.

P.S
Pushing is hard, regretting is harder

Greener pasture; to step over or not?

2010-08-17T21:48:00.002+08:00

There was a farm looked well by the farmer John, he feeds, care and nurture the animals in his farm, giving them the best he can offer and in return the animals to harvest the corps for him and provide his livelihood. The animals John can only afford are Chuck the Chicken, Porky the Pig, Connie the Cow and Shane the sheep, these few animals were always complaining about the work they need to do except Shane who love the farm and farmer John.

Chuck:" Why are we always working, always laying eggs for farmer john! I don't want to work, I want to move on to the other farm where the grass is greener and there are more potential mates for me over there!"

Porky:" Yeah that's right i just want to lay in the mud all day long like the pigs over on the other farm, and not work my back off over this side and becoming the farmers milking machine!"

Connie:" Yeah why cant i just eat grass all day long like the cows over on the other side and enjoy the sunset and sunrise without needing to strap a plow on my back!"

Shane:" I don't know about you guys, but i like it here, farmer john always feed me, take cares of me, loves me and always give me the best he can offer and in return i just need to keep his crops safe from rodents, I don't mind a bit."

Chuck:" Oh you silly sheep, look around you, your 19 years old and your still single, look over the other side, look at how happy the other sheep are on the other farm, being in a pack, eating grass all day, starting a family and enjoying the company they have. YOU MY DEAR SHEEP! have been always hanging out with us and haven even had a mate, i think its time you wake up and see the greener grass!"

Porky:" OINK! OINK! that's right silly sheep, I've seen you looking over at the pretty lambs the other side, don't you want to go over and mix around or stay here your whole life and watch crops grow, OINK! OINK!"

Connie:" MOO! They are right shane, we are all still sinlge and the farmer john wont even provide us with friends and family, we will all die lonesome here without a family and love one! I think its time we jump the fence and join the other farm!"

Shane:" Mehhh! i don't know, farmer john is so poor, yet he still gives us the best he can provide and if we run, he wont be able to run his farm any longer if we jump the fence over to the other farm, i still want to stay."

That night itself, when farmer John was sound asleep in his bed. Chuck, Connie and Porky jump the fence and left the farm to join the other farm which they say is better then their own farm without waking up Shane as well.

The next morning, Shane woke up and saw that all his friends have left him, Shane panicked and ran to the fence.

Shane:" MEHH! MEHH! OH NO! all my friends have left me to join the other farm, what should I do?! should i join them but i can't just leave poor farmer john like that! OH MEHH! what do i do?! what do i do?!

In all of the confusion, Shane just sat at the fence all day long, thinking whether he should join his friend on th greener side of the grass or stay with his beloved farmer john?

Shane:" MEHH! I have been sitting here all day long! If i stay here, i'll be all lonely and die a lonely sheep, i'll have no family, no love life, no kids! But if i jump over who knows whether they will accept me as part of the pack?! OH WHAT DO I DO?! MEHH!

Farmer John was looking around for his beloved animals all day long until sunset when he found shane sitting on the fence, looking confuse and feeling lost....

This story has no ending to it, I would leave it up to you to end the story, how you end it will determine what type of personality you hold but of course its not 100% accurate. And of course whether or not shane jumps the fence is up to you, i am sure if you are person who can read between the line, you can definitely put yourself in the same situation as well.

This is how i feel right now even this month itself, i am feeling lost in my own place, i look at the other place, it looks great with abundant chances, new friends and opporutnity in life but yet on the other hand if i leave my place, will they accept me, is it true whatever i see will become reality or am i just living the fantasy of the grass is greener on the other side and end up falling hard?

Is the grass greener on the other side? Should i take the jump and cross the fence?

Little things that makes life go up and down like a roller coaster

2010-08-01T20:59:00.002+08:00

Its been a super duper long time since i blog already,haha

Well today i was just surfing the net when i saw my blog and the title it write there
"THE LITTLE THINGS IN LIFE"

That's when it stumbled upon how little things in life can really change the way we live our life.

One thing for sure now is that being a christian, its really a joyous experience but life is not a bed of roses, so i can confess there have been time where days are really had to get by, there is so much insecurity, so much stress, so much things uncertain, things which would make my mind go crazy but at the end of the day i see myself on my knees crying and praying to God to lift me up from these burdens and I thank God there was never once He abandon me. Another thing would be fasting and praying, we always expect outcomes and result regarding to our prayer needs but ultimately I've got to learn to receive blessings according to His will. Such thing as a religion can make such a difference in my Life, being a naughty boy to a young gentleman comes a long way for me.

Also one thing that certainly everyone if not most can agree with me is the little thing called "love" we can never be sure of it or the opposite gender as well but one things I've learn is that it takes time, patience, understanding, self sacrifice, more patience and integrity. I am never a pro at relationships but one thing is that it changes a man inside out but it is also suppose to change your relationship with GOD.

Not forgetting as well, our social life, school, work, studies, siblings, family, friends; you name it but most of the time we tend to neglect the privileges we have in life, me myself including always complaining about everything when i fail to look at the bigger picture,
"Behind every flaw is a Beauty waiting to be discover"

Recently i also discovered how important a small part our body can be as well, like my ankle which i just sprain last Friday, little did i knew this small fraction of the feet can cause problems to me walking and ultimately making me bed ridden. so i would take extra precaution next time when playing any sports activity as to now harm any body parts, because of my sprain ankle, i cannot do so many things, i cant drive my car, i have to limp around, i cant walk much, i cant go the gym to work out, i cant run, jump, sprint, squat or even do simple push up exercise or else i would tear the muscles near the nut.

So peps at the end of the day, i realize my ultimate goal of writing this post is to remind you how important little things in our life can be and that we should not miss out the opportunity to live life out around the things in our life. Instead of complaining about everything, i challenge you all to clear your mind and try for once living life and enjoying every moment of it, instead of frowning and giving a sad face, try smiling and laughing more, Haha :) God bless all of your

Micheal Jackson

2010-06-27T22:11:00.002+08:00

Its been a year since that tragic news of the death of the King Of Pop Micheal Jackson but he still lives on in all of us. For a time being now the radio stations will be playing his songs everyday, at least three to five songs and my ears and heart are just delighted to hear his songs, they are so touching and energetic, even as i drive my car to school or anywhere, once his music start playing, my heart will start to beat faster and my emotions just run wild.

The power that no one can posses is the Power Of Love that Micheal portrait in all his songs, using the power of music and love to change the world one song at a time, truly no one can repeat what Micheal has done in his era, music took a new turn, it was no longer just for hearing pleasure or the funk, music was to change people, change our thinking, breaking down mental walls and changing the way we live and all his songs point back to LOVE. That's why i never stop to admire all of his sweet, beautiful and meaningful songs like "we are the world" "heal the world" "you are not alone" "I just can't stop loving you" "Man in the mirror" and plenty much more which i cant recall but it speaks of the Power Of Love.

Micheal Jackson we've never taken time to show you the love you deserve, we criticize you for your actions and behavior when really we are the one who needs to change and take a stand for love, your vision and the life you live, the songs you sings, the dance moves you make, your beautiful sweet voice and singing will forever remain in our hearts...If you had the chance to have your last concert "This Is It" Many more life's would've been changed and many more people will heed the call to love and never stop loving and most certainly the King Of Pop would revive the way rock,pop,human nature and Love would've been :)

Micheal Jackson thank you for everything you've done for this world and us all.

Micheal Jackson
"King Of Pop"
We love you always

Open Topic

2010-06-08T17:42:00.002+08:00

Yesterday for the first time in my life, i finally had the courage to talk to my mom about relationships, it was so uber duper cool, never did i knew my mom would be the best person to seek for advice and at times it was fun and funny to talk with her about this topic, she was cool about it as well.

Seeing that i am a newbie in relationships in life, there are many things i do not know, things which are unsure, things which i need advice but my mom told me that there is no sure formula to make relationships work out but always start it out as a friendship and just let things take it course and see whether or not things blossom.

Then i went on to ask her how can i know whether there are 'Signs' to watch out for to know whether i can make a move, my mom said just one word "Nope" we can never know cause you know girls Ken, they never know what they want, so take things one step at a time and now do i know it really takes a lot of patience, but patience always works out for the best and prayer is always a great key to keeping ourselves in check, cause when we put God first and honor Him, He will hear us and lend us a helping hand by His will. Besides who knows whats better for us than our mom and heavenly Father.

I am hoping and praying as i take another chance at this that God if by His will, will bless this friendship that i have with her and make it blossom into something. Even as i take this whole approach in a new way, that is the correct way of pursuing relationships.

God bless all of your holidays!

When God takes the wheel

2010-05-28T22:05:00.002+08:00

I would like to testify that when God takes the wheel behind your life, or when Gods will is playing out in your life. Life is beautiful.

When He wants you to met the people He wants you met, When He wants you to move on to something better in life the time He wants, When He wants you to live a great life for Him and so many more. Life is really really really really really really awesome.

All praise and glory to God when His will is being worked out in our lives. Never has my life been so clear, everything that happens, in the spirit, i keep hearing the words 'Praise God your behind all of these things that are happening'

The challenge is living each day according His will. Its a bumpy road but we'll always end up somewhere great.

Another Hard lesson in Life

2010-05-08T22:35:00.002+08:00

Yet again make way for another hard lesson in life...it never stops eh!?
The one thing I hate about Hard lessons in life is that at that time things seem to be going so well and fine...In the end it just drops like a bombshell on you when everything starts to crash down and everything seems like a mess, it cuts deep and wounds the heart, leaving a scar for life lessons learned.

If life could be played out like a movie, actually it almost seems like one but minus all that good things that always seems to work out and happen when things seem bad. Again i stand at the point of a broken road, feeling broken and lost inside out...feeling the heartache, disappointments. sadness, frustration........oh the pain of losing out again.....

I have lost again with the love game, this time it really changed me, i dont know who i am anymore now, before everything seem to crumble down, everyday seem like a day of hope, a day of expectancy, a day to look forward to...that's before things started to look bad bit by bit.

She was very nice, she entertained me, she gave me a chance to express myself before i found out that she actually like someone else but i feel thankful that at least she gave me chance to express myself, she didn't want to see me hurt, thats why she gave me the space, that glimmer of hope but after finding out she likes someone else, its only best if i take a step back and give up the chase, knowing that actually from the start i never really stood a chance..... All i can do now is hope the best work out for them, pray that everything works out, pray that God will bless their relationship and be happy for them.

A poem of how i feel

Your hair forever there
But never for me to touch,

Your eyes forever sparkling
But never for me to look into,

Your face forever glows
But never for me to hold,

Your Lips forever soft
But never for me to kiss,

Your Body forever innocent
But never for me to feel,

Your beauty forever in awe
But never for me to behold,

Woe is I,
As I wait for hope to arise!
that time I can confess my love,
that time we can be lovers!

Woe is I!
Foolish and ignorant!
Your kindness to avoid my brokenness....
Your glimmer of hope sympathizes me....

....You like a man
But woe not I

My first bass class

2010-04-25T21:13:00.002+08:00

Yes my M.U.E.T exam for writing,speaking and listening is over, there was some difficulty but through it all God was there for us all.

Now i will have to face mid-term, Dear God help me and guide me. One thing to look forward to is the lower 6 who is coming in soon, welcome you all.

Today i finally had my first bass class with Andrea and i must say she one uber cool and chun bass teacher, she is very chilling and she is really down to earth, not only she learn the bass herself, she can play like a pro as well. Today i learn to strecth my uber stuby fingers, cause for a bassist, they must be able to reach the frets and press down hard in order to get that clean and strong bass sound, so the finger exercising was tiring but after a while your fingers strengthen and you get it, then you moev to another exercise to change it futher. After that is variation of chords, that one is for next lesson after i figure out the chords for one song, not going online to find but hearing the song and writing it down.

Overall i am happy that i can finally start pursuing my bass playing after waiting off for a long time, may God use me mightily for his Kingdom and must like i always do, i will kacauing all the bass player out there to learn things from you all.

My dreams, Confession of my dreams

2010-04-22T23:09:00.004+08:00

Everyday I dream, dream, dream, dream, daydream, night dream, afternoon dream, half way doing things i also can wonder off and dream.

Dreaming is all that i can do because it gives me that moment of happiness and just a place where i really want to be at that time, just a step away from my boring life, just a step away from reality, where i can be everything that i want to be, everything that i want in life.

The things i dream of are things that i have always wish i accomplish in life, one would be of course a relationship which most of the time i would be dreaming of even when i am just standing there, if my mind is bored, it will just start to wander off into my dreams of being with someone next to me, just enjoying and laughing away, never have i see myself so happy excepts in dreams.

Another would be my dream of being someone else other than myself, someone who is way more talented, way more handsome and way better than i am. Someone who i would dream everyone's accept, everyone likes and everybody just takes him in. He has talent, looks and just way better than me. This dreams either is the better side of me winning a sport event or a competition and able to show my strength, another side would be showing talents. I always dreams these cause i never won a medal in a sport event, i can never sing a song beautifully, i am not a singer, i am not a guitarist, i cant play beautiful songs, i am just a drummer,loud messy and uncool huh...

Dream of my hard work paying off, being successful in my first try, after all of the changing, sacrificing, and almost killing myself , dream of becoming someone in school.....someone in my life...

But at the end of the day dreams are all so cruel, all i can do is dream, its give me hope at times, it give me inspiration at times but most of the time it breaks me down, it makes me realize what a failure i am...how at the end of the day on the inside i am still nobody at all...at the end of the day i dont mean a thing to anyone....what a loser i am......i am nobody.....

Dreams are so cruel, cant i just live in a world where i am happy and at peace...

Tell Yourself - Clazziquai project

2010-04-20T21:50:00.001+08:00

18 April 2010 S.u.N day

2010-04-18T14:40:00.002+08:00

Just an update to my blog, this month is a very busy month, partially because of the thesis we have to complete and hand up but i am done with it "THANK GOD" but there was two minor mistakes -_- but its all good. Exams are coming up in less than a months time and honestly, i am not prepared at all but one things for sure, i will give it my best with Gods help day by day.

Last week was a tiring week but amazingly I had his strength to pull me through but on T.G.I.F, i just couldn't help it but slept through the afternoon, a much much needed nap, and one which is a luxury now a days, on the other hand, this week has been fruitful as well in terms of spiritual growth, studies and even physical training. I am worried about sports day though cause being house captain, i haven completed my marching yet and i haven get the members prep for the events but they all tell me its not necessary as they will train themselves, well i tried my best and pray God for sports day and each of my members, i am taking part in javelin and cant throw far but wont give up trying until i reach the mark that i can with all my strength.

Also, things are bit hectic on the life of the juniors and us form6-ers as well cause well you know exams and everything, I pray dear God, you'd be even more present in this time to all of us, that through this hard times, testimonies and praises will go to you but most of all, we'll grow close to each other and You. On another note, just watch "The Lake house" a really old romance movie in 2006, I love the movie, its just full of hope and its really tells you the power of love and never giving up on each other. Somehow you can co-relate the love played out in the movie with 1cor 13 but its just my view, please don't take it too personally but love should be like it is said in the bible in 1 cor 13.

Overall, i really thank God for my life now, even though at times i am frus and upset with alot of things, i look to Him and draw strength to live my life out everyday, in order to serve Him, to help those in difficult times as best as I can. There is still a hint of me who is longing for a girls love but for now i will pray for God to fill me with His love, so that i can share this Love with others as well. See ya peps, take care and God Bless.

Out,
Ken D man

Just to end it all, i like this song by Mika - KICK ass, we are young, we are strong!

Breaking Benjamin-Give me a sign

2010-04-12T22:53:00.002+08:00

This is one of the songs for my favorite romance movie " The Lakehouse". Sometimes i really want a sign in life too, no need to feel lost and no longer the same anymore, i feel like i am breaking again inside.

Dead star shine
Light up the sky
I'm all out of breath
My walls are closing in
Days go by
Give me a sign
Come back to the end
The shepherd of the damned

I can feel you falling away

No longer the lost
No longer the same
And I can see you starting to break
I'll keep you alive
If you show me the way
Forever - and ever
the scars will remain
I'm falling apart
Leave me here forever in the dark

Daylight dies
Blackout the sky
Does anyone care?
Is anybody there?
Take this life
Empty inside
I'm already dead
I'll rise to fall again

I can feel you falling away

No longer the lost
No longer the same
And I can see you starting to break
I'll keep you alive
If you show me the way
Forever - and ever
the scars will remain
I'm falling apart
Leave me here forever in the dark

God help me I've come undone
Out of the light of the sun
God help me I've come undone
Out of the light of the sun

I can feel you falling away

No longer the lost
No longer the same
And I can see you starting to break
I'll keep you alive
If you show me the way
Forever - and ever
the scars will remain

Give me a sign
There's something buried in the words
Give me a sign
Your tears are adding to the flood
Just give me a sign
there's something buried in the words
Give me a sign
Your tears are adding to the flood
Just give me a sign
There's something buried in the words
Give me a sign
Your tears are adding to the flood

Forever - and ever
The scars will remain

Now only do I realize

2010-04-05T21:14:00.002+08:00

Regret, sad, confused, frustrated, broken, lost, stress...This are the words that can only describe what i am going through after seeing what has happened, finally realizing what has happen.

Looking back, thinking and reevaluating what happen in my past, i realize there is a significant pattern to the mistake i make and the price i would have and is paying for taking the risk i took. When i think that we have something special, it was just actually her being own self, i was overconfident in thinking that we had something special between us, every time i neglect to take a look at whether there is something between us or its just plain playing around to me.

Every time i get a bit too confident in thinking that i have a chance with this girl or that girl and the risk involved is losing a friend, i don't know why but somehow along the way of pursuing a relationship, somehow if i don't even do anything, she will tend to avoid me thus letting history repeat itself and leaving me confused and frustrated, not only do i lose myself but a friend as well. They wont even take a chance with me or give me a chance to prove myself to them, somehow sometimes i can tell that they worry that i am the kind who is a gentleman on the outside but in truth is not, that is A TOTAL LIE... past mistakes might have taught your a few things but you have to understand that not all guys are the same, not all guys share the same heart, not all guys are jerks, not all guys are lies, not all guys are fake. I am not the same as your ex's or even a bit like them.

I only feel regret now to make a move on her, either things get better or they just continue to spiral downwards. People always tell me, dont try so hard, a girl will come to you and i can see that your can say that because your are already in a relationship, try being in my shoes for a moment, you would really feel so frustrated with everything, after everything i've done, whats wrong now!? There must aleways be something in the way.....

Now do i only realize what a fool i am for not listening to poeples advice. What a fool i am for giving myself so much hope, what a fool i am for messing thing up again, what a fool i am for hurting myself and others again, what a fool i am for even thinking for a moment someone like her likes me. What a fool i am for playing the love game again and what a fool i am for taking the risk....

What about now?

2010-03-30T23:51:00.002+08:00

What about now,
What about today,
What if you’re making me all that I was meant to be,
What if our love never went away,
What if it’s lost behind words we could never find,
Baby, before it’s too late,
What about now.

I haven heard from you for a while, no replies, just hi and bye. Ever wandering where i stand but never dare to ask, scared of losing out again. If i could sing my feelings for you right now in a simple chorus it would be this.
What about now? are we making any progress?
what about today? would you give me a try?
What if you're making me all that i was meant to be? What if you are my life?
What if our love never went away? Please give me a chance to prove myself to you.
What if its lost behind words we could never find? Words i never dare ask, the word that could either shock you or open up yourself to me.
Baby, before its too late, before we lose out this chance and never get to turn back time.
What about now? Why don't we take a chance between us ?

This is the song i sing everytime i see you

2010-03-28T23:00:00.002+08:00

Every time I see you at a distance, at times so near yet so far away, at times close and wanting to get closer but it takes time. Each time i see you, this is the song i would sing to you if i could express my feelings for you.

Feeling the pinch of reality again

2010-03-23T23:52:00.003+08:00

Haha you'll never guess what happen peps, somebody left a comment on one of my post on the 'x' factor thing, if you cant find it, this is what he wrote

Understandably your article helped me terribly much in my college assignment. Hats off to you enter, intention look progressive for more interrelated articles in a jiffy as its sole of my favourite subject-matter to read.

Haha, he find my article useful for his/her college assignment, well whoever you are out there i am glad my blog articles helped you in a way as i can never see it that way, thank you for the complements and i hope future articles will provide help as well.

Ok moving on, Its been six days after camp, only two days back in reality, back down to earth and......I am already struggling, feeling sad and losing myself again. I will never forget the last day of camp where i said i never want to leave that atmosphere of peace because when i am back down here, so many things fall in, so many things start to pile, alot of problems will start to surface.....Worse of all is the lack of support, in the camp, there was never a moment where i would be on my own, there would always be somebody there next to me, i never felt so secure, peaceful and relax in my life and I can never stop thanking God for all these lovely people who help me be the man i am today, who really change me back to the way i was meant to be.

but seems right now, slowly i am spiralling back down into my old self again, losing hope and faith in Him and myself but He always lifts us up and brings us support in time of need.

I would've to keep my chin and spirit up, wouldn't want to let Him down, wouldn't want others to speak against my troubled self, its better to keep the sad and put on the mask of lies that show i am fine when i am really have some problems to face because then and only then would people care about you, sad to say.

But there are those of golden heart, really a heart so warm and kind, it just makes you melt and feel all the better when they give you a hearing ear or a warm hug, this can really break you down in tears to let it all out, just a single touch can remind us we are never alone. So i challenge those reading this post, if you canl, help a troubled friend today, just a hug or a shoulder to cry on.

All in all, i wont give up too early, its not the end of me yet, because i would bounce back up pretty high and i will give it my best until i cant, i would take a breather and bounce back up again.

Tokio hotel-World Behind my wall

2010-03-21T21:20:00.002+08:00

Heard this song a few times a week already and at one point i was sick of it when all of sudden i hear on radio, someone explaining what does this song mean? What are the lyrics about?

The song is about not experiencing love before and all day long he hears about how beautiful it all is, how great it is, how wonderful it is behind his wall of his world, so it speaks about how much he is willing to sacrifice to crawl his way into love, and his eagerness to get there.

So yeah that's basically it and somehow i can relate to this song.

Coming up short? missing 'x' factor!?

2010-03-20T22:50:00.002+08:00

I have to ask just this questions to the girls out there

What is that 'X' factor your look for in a guy?

Does first impression help us guys win your heart faster?

What can a guy do to win your heart and be secure and sure of us to be together in a relationship?

Cf camp 2010

2010-03-19T22:09:00.002+08:00

Smk Taman SEA CF camp by far is the best camp in my life, that three days totally touched and changed my life.I am now very nostalgic and missing the camp alot not because of the fun and rocking the drums for Jesus only but the people in it as well.

I also really like the worship teams alot, especially group 3, awesome people like racheal, liyen, william, lydia, jeff, felix, christian, christin and so many more people who has made this camp the best part of my life. Your all truly showed me love and care that really melt my heart and mend my brokenness inside out, love you'll so much and i will never miss rocking out with Jesus with all of your. BIG HUGS!

I also miss my team Tortilla so much, team members michelle, pei jiun, brenda, andrea, zi yoong, daryl, william and sherwiin. You all are such great team members, i would not have never ask for a better team, i would also like to personally thank andrea and christine for helping me lead the team, wouldn't been possible without both of our help, love your all alot, hugs.

Also there is the drummer team, daniel and joel, thank you guys so much for trusting me in everything and helping me in organising the drums and also being a close brother to me, i am forever grateful for your care,concern and love.

Last but not least are all the other campers who have touched me and made this camp such a memorable one, le on, melvin, elaine, kok hoon, yew leung, racheal cheah, Hilary, erin, huey wern, sheng khai, joshua, justin, samantha, tien mie, karina, wesley, li ren and all the others who i have not mention, thank you all for being apart of my life and making this camp truly special for me.

'Sob' I'll miss all the worship sessions i had with all the teams, i'll miss seeing all of you in my church again, and most of all i'll miss the bond and fun we shared with camp. Thank you God for all these people who have changed my life, and this awesome camp which i will never forget my whole life, bless and protect them all.

8th day of March

2010-03-08T23:02:00.002+08:00

Manic Monday, today was a special Smk Taman S.E.A canteen day, its basically selling all kinds of food to our students and i really enjoy and had fun in the process of going around and seeing which club and friends need help, but most of the time was spent on buying, drinking and eating.

ALSO A BIG SHOUT OUT TO MY TWO CLASSMATES!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANITHA AND ATIQAH!
Have a great year and great life now and forever, happiness and peace be with you all day of your life.

Well today is a manic monday, starting with canteen day, after that i had my first ever interhouse games, i joined handball and even though blue house did not do dairly well, we will never give up and we would go down with style if it maybe. One thing that defeat though me, in my sheer defeat and humiliation, i've learn that i've got to lose at times, that way i learn and get back up again to face the thing with maturity and better. The lose really brough me down cause i had too much of high hopes until the point i forgot to enjoy the game, so tomorow is to just enoy the game within the process of the competition.

One more thing that struck me was that theres a BIG day around the corner and as the clocks tick down, i haven figure out a day,time and a treat for myself, i haven even though of the activities to do on my birthday =P. Hopefully i can come up with something fast,haha

I shall stop here now, my lesson for the day,

no matter how prepared we are, losing/ surrender is always there/ an option, the main thing is to learn from it and face it in the near future with maturity and effectively.

Month of March, the 3rd day

2010-03-03T23:06:00.003+08:00

On this day, i woke up in the morning with a bad hunch on my back that today is not gonna be the normal day is gonna turn out to be, i though oh well maybe its just me being groggy, well that hunch was so right today.

The day started out quite bad first with my groggy self, first time in my life i felt grogginess, everything i think of, i whine complain in my mind, getting all stressed out. My fist step in school and i receive news of payments and well seeing i was low on cash, i was quite upset with a certain club which has been taking money from us quite frequently this week and well i dont mind paying, its just that i dont see the value worth of the amount of money involved, so i ended up getting into little arguments and nagging with my classmate, thus came my great fall, mainly also because i was quite stress and grumpy. I have this feeling that i am always constrain to express the way i feel, when i am angry, i have to hold it in, if not we lose face ; when i feel insulted or disgusted, i would hold back my agruments because somehow i always end up being the loser ; when i am sad, people see me as problematic and little help is given, but i truly thank those who try to cheer me up.

Also the bachelor life get quite daunting no me as well, everyday thinking of the day i would find her.......well..... if only people would listen and understand peoples situation, we would listen and comfort rather than brush off the problems as nothing now, small matter and all the bull that people always say just to avoid the conversation, when the times comes and you find yourself in the same situation, would you yearn for a shoulder to lean on? give it some though the next time you go brushing off peoples cry for a shoulder to lean on.

March, i just hope that the next few days, you would be better than this day, oh i pray that this month will not be so bad...

No more CNY but look ahead what's up

2010-03-01T00:28:00.002+08:00

As everybody know yesterday was the last day of Cny, which is usually called as chap goh meh, please forgive and correct me if my spelling is wrong. Usually on this last day, families will enjoy a feast together and of course the usual sounds of fireworks will fill the air until the last final hours left of our Chinese New Year. As sad i am to say Cny is over and February is over, i am happy that march has arrived.

Another new month ahead of me which i am sure would be filled with work, fun, up, down ,left. right and only God knows what else. I look ahead to my time in March as the first two months felt like almost a year, i sigh a relief to know that its only march but in that also a relisation of the time i have left in 2010.

Well it would be for one or two obvious reasons why i love/like the month of march. The main thing i would love to see as i write down my first post of march is a couple of things, i would like to see some happyness and peace in life, I would like to see some excitement, changes are for sure, well some new pretty girls to met would be nice, something exciting and interesting happening ( the good fun one not the stressful until i want to die type), so many more to say, so little time to do. only so much i can expect to come true, only so much will happen by God willing, of course one thing in concern would be a special day in my life which i have taken for granted my whole life, not treating a special day to myself, not showing myself some love and appreciation by appreciating the day i arrive into earth and life.

Here come and goes another past in my life, feb has been a difficult time, there are the good and bads but i always try to look on the positive side as best as i can.

March, well i am never a far seeir type, the future planning type but i can forsee a month of excitement,hope and love for me....I hope and pray =P but whatever it is i am glad i am still alive this day to live my 19th march of the year in my whole life, with friends and family near and dear to me, i would not expect much for this month and the special day but one thing i overlook is the day i was born into this world, i should appreciate it and love myself for being here, though not receiving much, i must love myself andf treat it a special day for myself, because this was the day my parents gave birth to me, the day God created and gave me life onto earth, the day i first drew breath and started my life's journey.

Well March, let us March on together to a greaet month ahead. Dear God i pray, this march would be a March to remember for.

My friday

2010-01-29T23:43:00.003+08:00

Friday, a day which i rejoice for the ending week of school and look forward to the Saturdays.

But today was not like any other typical Friday, today was a very different kind of day might i say. One thing for sure today is i was totally burned out, my will and determination was just not there today, i did not have that push and energy i have in me every other day to push me on the whole day, today was a flat out. I notice i did not find enjoyment in the usual things i did anymore, i became down, tired and weak, i did no show much involvement and energy which i usually do at Cf.

At the gym, i really wanted to skip gym today but its all talk only, my self esteem was at a drop as well as i don't have that confidence i usually had in me, i was looking down on my self again, old habits die hard. Another thing was i lost control my mentally, at the gym most of the time its 30% strength and 70% mental physe, so i couldn't go as far as i could, last time 17kgs which was moderate became heavy, 30kgs which can be lifted, just could not be budged. I felt like breaking down just after my dumbbell presses after failing double attempts on the 30kgs, as i was doing my dumbbell flys, again i face the same problem, the weights which could be lifted correctly and all the way full strenght just became a challenge to even lift it finish as my form was off.

At that instant i was watching the tele which was showcasing a very special tennis player, she shared her hardest moment in life, which she lost out flat to ther oppenent, what was suppose to be a great year for her became a ultimate failure when she lost in the first round, she broke down on national tv, immediately my emotions flew as i could relate that feeling of upset, failure, loneliness, stress and regret, i was going to tear but my man hood always stand in my way to keep my tears in, to hide it from public, all i could do was give a sigh and back to my regime. Thank God i got myself back in shape after focusing myself again, and the rest of the workout worked out fine but i was totally burned out, really feeling down and lonely.

The feeling i have been and am feeling right now since the begginging of this day was the feeling of belonging, i just needed that sense of touch and love from someone, someone to hold in my arms, just drop a few tears, fell her in my arms and hear her say its all gonna be ok. Just that feeling of love, care and compassion would change my day for the better, it could break this man down into a tender child, it would give me strenght to carry on for the rest of my days. Never have i had the yearning to hold someone in my arms this bad, i really need it so badly, looking at the days that have gone by and the days to come, i just need someone to hold and love to keep me going.

My one place to lean on became my bed of torns

2010-01-23T21:18:00.002+08:00

Today was a very tiring day and quite a lonely day as i ended up doing half of today things alone, well school is an exception because i will surely meet my friends but the sad part is all of them have coupled up T.T so sometimes they do click together as a group but i am really happy for them all as a friend and classmate. They all say love is not everything but if only i could express the feelings i feel during that time to them.

Today I had to attend a replacement school day for chinese new year, so this is norm as its always been like that, we ended later than the usual 12.30 because we are from 6-ers.... -.- !.... But luckily it was only half an hour later than usual cause i had my math tuition to attend after that, what started with four people ended with me alone having tuition, i was very tired after the tuition and the though of going for my usual youth gathering in church make me feel at least a sense of comfort that i can go there to destress and relax...so i taugh.

When i arrived there, i will skip the usual part. what shock me the most is howcome a gathering can become a therapy session for family members, i mean if you have a family problem, i think its only wise to keep it in the four walls of your family, besides that it would also wise to discuss matters in a more suitable and gentle manner, as a adult and youth. There was also an offer to help out someone in need, they went on and on and on, but i was thinking it he is alright, why bother him so much, the reality is he needs to get back to God but why make it such a big fuss.

I did one of the worst mistake, i told them all that the only way is to help himself and God can help in the way, its true we cant leave him to wallow alone but they don't see its what we are all always doing, not to say i am not guilty, when ever one of us are in hardtimes or going through some tough times, they never tend to them, leave it alone help out as much. Thats just what they did to me, i was having a difficult time and did they help me out? one person did and i am forever grateful to him but the rest just sat on and I HAD TO ENDURE EVERYTHING WITH MY OWN STRENGHT! so dont tell me we've got to help when you all know your CANT do it! Its just all a talk to your all, by the end of the day, the poor guy would be all alone struggling.

I know many things have been let out in my blog, this post is more personal as it really pissed me off to hear people tell me off with lies and false promises. They all give me advice yet they dont try to understand the situation before speaking. Love is not everything, they say. Loev is what i need to go on all the days of my life.

Thus the season to fall in love?!

2010-01-19T23:39:00.002+08:00

Everywhere now comes the sound of "ohh" "ahh" "omg" "haha" "really?" and etc

Not a doubt that by the sound of that, we can understand either someone close has fall in love with someone close to you as well or friends falling in love together and getting into a relationship.

Thus the good season and year and month to fall in love, mainly its the start of the new year, start of the month, what better time to propose than now, where everything is a fresh and new.
My heartfelt congratulations to all those who are in a relationship now, God bless your relationship from the little walks to down the aisle of marriage.

What about others? Those who are struggling with this so called L>O>V>E? Those who cant seem to find love at this moment in time? Those who strive and work hard to get into love but cant?

We can do the best thing that is to be happy for our dear beloved friends who are in a relationship and be patient for out turn to come, no one said its gonna be a fairy tale life. Fight the good fight and keep the faith.

For us out there who are single, thus the season to fall in love, thus the season to try our chances again, its a new year with new opportunity and a year of abundance. If we cant seem to get love, thus the season to be rewarded and sow your fruits.

Same interest or the first look attention?

2010-01-16T23:22:00.002+08:00

First of all a big hi to my English teacher, she says i write too many complicated and theoretical post, so i am start things of a little simple minded this time, haha.

Hello everybody, today was a busy day for me as usual, who would've though i would be occupied on my Saturday 0.0 ?! First thing i was grateful, i got to wake up at 8.20am, finally a sleep satisfying. Then it was off to the gym at around 9, after my workout, a shower then off tuition from 11.30 to about 3.40 then it was off to church for youth cell group and then back home for a breather then off again to church for worship practice, then it was off to giant after the practice around 7 to get some groceries, then back home at about 8.30 for dinner, and now here i am around 11.30 writing this post, haha. Ok back to my topic.

As i was going through fb today, i just couldn't help but notice all the lovey dovey quotes and praises exchange between one of my friends and his gf, kononnya mau low-profile, ahem.

Anyways that started me thinking of an advice by my English teacher, she said that it was better to wait for love until uni because we can find people of the same interest and so on, mainly of course because of the study time table. I agree with that as it sounds logical and it is reasonable but i would like to also put forward my opinion and thoughs about this.

Many people now a days says that we can screw that whole personality and seeing their heart cliche statement, there is always that first attention graber or the first click and i belive strongly in this as well and its the truth behind blind love now a days but it is necessary for a relationship to spark or bloom.Haven you notice how some girls attention are grab away by all the bad boys, the look, the way they act, the way they behave, the way that they are just attracts them or even the good looking hunky handsome guys, which shining beauty and awe struck looks sweeps the girls off their feet, damn edward.

Also through my past "experiences", i have notice that i do not have that first attentiong graber to hook on a girl, now i understand why they call it fishing, its baiting and attracting the fish to grab it then slowly relling it in. Same concept, you need that bait, the attention graber, the one thing that makes them tell thier gurlfriends about you and then giving you the signals or even hinting you. Most of the times i will be the fish rather than the fisher, hook on to the line but not acceptable to the fisher and thrown back in the river, though hard as i try i will end up losing.

'sigh' whats a guy like me going to do, if i am too nice, girls despice me and think i am planning something, if i dont look good, i am just another guy, worse of all i dont know what i have that is special, that can get their attention, thats why i go to the gym, in hoping looking better can help give me chance, hopefully the outer beauty can help lead them to my inner beauty.

Like creed says, I feel its gonna rain like this for days, so let it rain down and wash everything aways, i hope that the sun tomorow will shine, with every tommorows comes another life.

Who I am - Nick Jonas and the Administration

2010-01-10T20:49:00.000+08:00

Chorus:
I want someone to love me
for who I am.
I want someone to need me.
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
but it's all I have.
I want someone to love me
for who I am.

Verse 1:
Nothing makes sense.
Nothing makes sense anymore.
Nothing is right.
Nothing is right when you're gone.
Losing my breath.
Losing my right to be wrong.
I'm writing to death.
I'm writing that I will be strong.

Chorus:
I want someone to love me
for who I am.
I want someone to need me.
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
but it's all I have.
I want someone to love me
for who I am.

Verse 2:
I'm shaking it off.
I'm shaking off all of the pain.
You're breaking my heart,
Breaking my heart once again.

Chorus:
I want someone to love me for who I am.
I want someone to need me.
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
but it's all I have.
I want someone to love me
for who I am.

Bridge:
Are you gonna love me
(yeah)
for who I am?

Chorus:
I want someone to love me
for who I am.
I want someone to need me.
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
but it's all I have.
I want someone to love me
for who I am.
(yeah)
Who I am.

Is there L.U.C.K in L.O.V.E or is it chance?

2010-01-06T23:00:00.002+08:00

I would like to congratulate a friend of mine who have found a partner for himself, if you know who you are which i think you do, i am happy for you and God bless your relationship from now till marriage. Ps, she is pretty.

Of course most of us, peps like me are noisy when it comes to relationship, we just want to know the story behind the love. Well as i find out that this friend of mine got together with the girl because secretly she had feelings for him/like him.

This got me a curious thinking when my first words were LUCKY GUY!? That when i went to play again, is there such a element such as luck in love or is it by chance? or some might call it fate?

I am not sure and i don't know whether anybody has the correct answer because love and life is unpredictable and there is no fix answers to love and life, if not the author of that book "Answers to Love and Life" will be a millionaire, maybe even richer than bill gates. So I'm thinking imagine if I was that lucky, wow i would be the happiest guy on earth right now, having like you for sometime and then need to secretly tell you, ah teen romance eh, such luck be fold upon me would be a fantastic blessing in my life.

But is it really luck that befall upon him because he had first break up with a ex to get to her, upon that waiting some time for her and then after meeting each other for sometime they got together, to me i feel that its luck cause first of all She Likes him, well in my experience, i don't have that great opportunity of having a pretty like me or more over a dream girl of our choice liking me, that is hard to come by but possible, i am not giving up yet.

On the other hand wise we can also say that it was by chance and fate that brought them together because he had a relationship during her liking for him but she waited for him, i guess, such a nice girl, first girl i ever see to do that. Then when he broke up with his ex, we all ought to know the suffering, sorrow and pain behind it, some or most who have experience would understand that feeling. After that period of suffering, he got her, so it might be chance that open up the doors for them both or fate that simply brought them together as the right couple, i hope. Such great opportunity to be able to let go of the past upon hearing he has a new love.

So Is there LUCK in LOVE or is it chance, fate? I don't know, we will only find out when it is our turn to fall in love or when the time comes. Then only can we really understand the process of Love and life.

Whatever written in this post does not play out truly and fully the love story of my friend and his new found love. I would like top ask any forgiveness if i have trespass any boundaries and written some wrong information.

Ps,
I am so jealous. Be good to her yeah, be grateful, and enjoy your new found love. Have a great journey together.

2010

2010-01-02T20:34:00.002+08:00

Yo peps, THIS IS MY FIRST POST OF 2010! YEAHH! HOORAY! HUHUHU! Clap clap clap!

Ok weird and a bit overrated but there is a first for everything in the new year, like my first though of 2010, my first night of 2010, my first movie of 2010(AVATAR 3D! AWESOMEE!), my first blank though of 2010(yes it is true we guys can be very good stonners) and many more!and by monday it would be the first school day of 2010,oh man here comes hel*ahem...school.

What i like most of 2010 even though it the beginning of the year and its just the second day is not only my first 3D movie which was awesome, avatar was nice, mainly because i wish i could have a avatar my own and wish i could journey to another planet so beautiful such as pandora. Anyways coming back, the other thing i like most of 2010 is the no.10, Go figure.

Another thing that came to mind was looking back at all the years, years past by just like that, every year seems to by faster than i know it and before i know, its too late to enjoy the year but for particular reason, i am so glad 2009 has ended because it was hell of a year but of course there were the good moments. One thing i think we can all keep in mind is how 2010 is gonna be for us is how we expect it to be.

We never know what is going to happen to us in this new year 2010, anything can happen at anytime and anywhere, what we can expect are that there will be a balance share of good and bad times given the benefit of the doubt but i pray this year will be a year if blessing for all of you, lets take this opportunity to rewrite that life of ours, its time for another chapter in our life, time to write a whole new journey in our lifes, lets fill it with happyness.

Basically, 2010 is a different year for everybody, some would be major exams like spm,pmr,upsr, college end semester, STPM!(ahh like me) and so on, other would be just another year but what we can asure its gonna be a great journeyt infront of us, are we ready to venture in? well if your not, TOO BAD! you already did,hahaha since friday. Dont worry, lets take thing one at a time and lets let life play out itself but in all thing which i find hardest is trusting God in everything.

Well peps and friends and family, happy new year 2010, i leave with you with my prayers that 2010 will be a blessed year for you, a year of harvesting the fruits, a year of joy,happyness and of course may all your dreams come true.

Sick for the first time in a looong time

2009-12-22T21:43:00.002+08:00

As the title says Ahhh I am sick for the first time in a super uber duper luper long time!

Before that i enjoyed myself in penang. I ate, ate and ate andddd...Ate! Yummy i love penang food, lovely prawn mee, char kuey teow, pasembor, lok lok, bu bu cha cha, tao hui and so many more but most of all Penang white coffe, they taste just like starbucks but better according to me.

Right after i came back, the next day, I feel sick....dang. Just as i wanted to be back a the gym so badly due to the extra kilo's puted on, I was ready to pump iron again when I felt bad. I started to fall sick slowly, its was like a horror movie, first i felt weak, then dizzy, then came the fever, then came the flu, then the sorethroat but praise God it is before christmas. One thing i know for sure that it takes a SUPER BUG to make me sick, so people becareful when I'm sick cause the Super Bug jumps around, Why Super Bug, because i rarely get sick but seems like this week is the season of the bug cause people are falling ill. Hopefully i am not patient Zero =P

Please do check out the pics i put up on facebook and do check out a awesome video with it too.

This song is suitable for me now!

2009-12-06T00:27:00.001+08:00

Lostprophets: Its not the end of the world now but I can see it from here

Woahohoh, Woahohoh, Woahohohoh
Woahohoh, Woahohoh, Woahohohoh

My soldiers march tonight
In the city of your dreams
It's beautiful on me, and tearing at your seams
Down on your knees, queuing this disease
I'll take it all, everything I see
Oh can't your hear, this symphony

Behind these walls, you watch them fall
As our union crumbles into hell
It's not the end of the world now baby, so common dry those tears
It's not the end of the world now darling, but I can see it from here

Oh baby dont cry tonight, because your tears they will bleed
Underneath this blood red moon, deafened by your screams
Watch what you say, I will betray
My promises, they will decay
I'll make amens, but not today

Behind these walls, youre watch them fall
As our union crumbles, into hell
It's not the end of the world now baby, so common dry those tears
It's not the end of the world now darling, but I can see it from here

It's not the end of the world now baby, so common dry those tears
It's not the end of the world now darling, but I can see it from
I can see it from here, I can see it from here

It's not the end of the world now baby, so common dry those tears
It's not the end of the world now darling, but I can see it from here
It's not the end of the world now baby, so sommon dry those tears
It's not the end of the world now darling, but I can see it from here

Woahohoh, Woahohoh, Woahohohoh
Woahohoh, Woahohoh, Woahohohoh

You win again

2009-12-04T21:58:00.002+08:00

Yesterday and for the past week, something bumped me in the head, my mind started to think logically for the first time in a while, not using my heart but logical mind and thinking. I finally saw the truth and reality that nothing is happening between us, all the time, effort spend on trying to gain back your trust has been not successful, i finally realize that it was time to put up the white flight and give up....

It is time to let you go, time to put everything down, time to give up everything, time to stop trying but most of all its time to admit defeat and failure because now i have lost again...

Well here i am again, broken again, sad to know the truth that today as i let go of you and everything, its also the time i have realize i was playing a losing game. I have to take yet another blow of defeat and failure, another painful memory for me and my past.

Now i am left with one more scar on my heart, i am sorry for everything i've done to her, my only wish was a different answer and also that i did not make a move at all.

This is the song of my heart

2009-12-01T00:43:00.002+08:00

Lyricz:
I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when I'm colder

In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
Cant stop now, Ive traveled so far
To change this lonely life

I wanna know what love is.....
I want you to show me......
I wanna feel what love is.....
I know you can show me......

I'm gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me....
Ive got nowhere left to hide
It looks like love has finally found me....

In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
I cant stop now, Ive traveled so far
To change this lonely life

I wanna know what love is.....
I want you to show me......
I wanna feel what love is......
I know you can show me......

I wanna know what love is....
I want you to show me....
And I wanna feel, I want to.... feel what love is....
And I know, I know you can show me....

show me

I wanna know what love is, lets talk about love
I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too
I wanna feel what love is, I want to feel it too
And I know and I know, I know you can show me
Show me love is real, yeah
I wanna know what love is...

Time for miracles Adam Lambert

2009-11-22T21:09:00.002+08:00

Lyrics:
It's late at night and I can't sleep
Missing you just runs too deep
Oh I can't breathe thinking of your smile

Every kiss I can't forget
This aching heart ain't broken yet
Oh God I wish I could make you see
Cuz I know this flame isn't dying
So nothing can stop me from trying

Baby you know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on LOVE
You know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on LOVE
No I ain't giving up on us

I just wanna be with you
Cuz living is so hard to do
When all I know is trapped inside your eyes

The future I cannot forget
This aching heart ain't broken yet
Oh God I wish I could make you see
Cuz I know this flame isn't dying
So nothing can stop me from trying

Baby you know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on LOVE
You know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on LOVE
No I ain't giving up on us

Baby can you feel it (feel it)
You know I can hear it (hear it)
So can you feel me feel you....

You know it's time....

Baby you know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on LOVE
You know that
Maybe it's time for miracles
Cuz I ain't giving up on LOVE

You know I ain't giving up on us
You know I ain't giving up on
Oh I ain't giving up on us

Copyrights of video goes to SONY PICTURES and youtube

When I gaze upon eyes of love

2009-11-18T21:04:00.002+08:00

In my darkest day and time,
Only to lay my eyes upon,
Something so beautiful yet fragile,
Something common yet hard to find,
Something that gives life yet takes it too,
Something that can break and mend a heart,
Words cannot describe finish what is know as LOVE;

On my hopeless time,
Only to set my heart upon,
Two beings coming as one heart,
Two beings beating,sharing,enjoying one beat of heart,
Two beings with a power strong enough to move mountains,
Two beings with a power that cannot separate them,
Two beings coming together as one,
Words cannot describe finish what is know as LOVE;

On my lonely moments,
Only to gaze upon,
The eyes of the bride and groom,
The eyes of lovers first,
The eyes of togetherness,
The eyes of passion,
The eyes of commitment,
The eyes of desire,
A stare which says a thousand words,
Words cannot describe finish what is know as LOVE;

In my darkest day and time,
Only to lay my eyes upon;
On my hopeless time,
Only to set my heart upon;
On my lonely moments,
Only to gaze upon;
A beauty that cannot be describe,
A power so strong it defines a persons life,
A drive that beats the heart beat,
A feeling that only lovers know;
LOVE.....

When i gaze upon eyes of love,
I can only hope I will met her someday,
I can only hope I am ready for her someday,
I can only hope I am good enough for her,
I can only hope she will be in my arms someday,
I can only hope to embrace her with all my heart someday,
I can only hope to give her my all someday,
I can only hope to see her beautiful self someday,
I can only hope to see her smile someday,
I can only hope to share my life with her someday,
I can only hope for my turn to be in LOVE;

Love,
Make your way to me,
Show me the way,
Lead me to the right one,
Make me a better man for her,
Make me a man that cherish,
Make me a man that is grateful,
Make me a man that understands,
Make me a man that is committed,
Make me a man that is passionate,
Make me a man that is sensitive,
Make me a man,
Ready to LOVE her all of my days.

ToKiO hOtEL aUtOmATic

2009-11-17T00:02:00.001+08:00

Automatic
Automatic

You're automatic,
And your heart's like an engine
I die with every beat
You're automatic,
And your voice is electric
Why do I still believe?

It's automatic
Everywhere in your letter
A lie that makes me bleed
It's automatic
When you say things get better
But they never...

There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
Why do I keep loving you

It's automatic,
Counting cars on a crossroad
They come and go like you
It's automatic,
Watching faces I don't know
Erase the face of you

It's automatic
Systematic
So traumatic
You're automatic

There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
Why do I keep loving you

Automatic
Automatic
Automatic
Automatic

Each step you make
Each breath you take
Your heart. Your soul.
Remote-controlled
This life is so sick
You're automatic to me

(Love in you)
(Love in you)
There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you

There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
Why do I keep loving you?

Automatic
(There's no real)
Automatic
(Love in you)
Automatic
(Why do I)
Automatic
(Keep loving you?)
Automatic...

Friends in Love

2009-11-12T21:47:00.002+08:00

Hands up if you have friends who are in a relationship ( cheers to your friends)

Both hands up if your in one yourself (Congratulations, good job ;)

I don't know about you my friends but one thing which i find hard in life is to find a life partner or even be in love. In this world where we are treated so unfairly, even receiving gestures of love and kindness is very hard to come by, even receiving a hug is a becoming extinct now a days, the only gesture shared amongst lovers, family and friends which is so rarely act upon these days.

Well in my life i have seen many friends who have fallen in love together and I am very happy for them because its just a joy to see your friends finally happy in love but of course there is always a mix feeling in us when we look at our friends in love.

One of it would be that we would kudos to their achievement, wishing them a happily ever after, hoping that things would work out for them, wishing them a long lasting relationship.

The second view would be the question that ponders in our mind,
When will I ever have my chance at love?
When can i ever experience that kind of love?
When will my chance at that kind of happyness come?

I've countless friends who have had many relationships and then there is me the bachelor who has not even succeed in starting off a relationship......Friends tell me its better off that i do not face the drama in my young life, that sometimes its better that we are single, that sometimes its better if we are single but i just cant seem to beat off the fact that sometimes being single is very lonely at times, being single sometimes makes life a drag, it becomes very frustrating to always see other people so happy and here you are one man facing the world alone, sooner or later it becomes a fear, scared that life will always be like this....I don't want that and i cannot face that, if my life played out like this forever, i don't know what i would do.

So to my friends who have shared their love story with me, their ups and downs, their happyness and heartbreak, thank you for teaching me and giving me a sound advice. I also would like to advice to those who are in a relationship, the moment you said yes to him/her, you are willing to give that person a chance at your life, your willing to go through the roller coaster of life together because you said yes to that chance.

Well all i can say that i am just one man who is trying find his ways arounf this world, always finding ways to fall in love, trying ways to earn some love in this world. All i can leave behind now is a song by
Paramore All i wanted was you

{Verse 1}
Think of me when you're out, when you're out there
I'll beg you nice from my knees
When the world treats you way too fairly
It's a shame I'm a dream

{Chorus}
All I wanted was you
All I wanted was you

{Verse 2}
I think I'll pace my apartment a few times
And fall asleep on the couch
And wake up early to black and white re-runs
That escaped from my mouth

{Chorus}
All I wanted was you
All I wanted was you
All I wanted was you
All I wanted was you

{Verse 3}
I could follow you to the beginning
Just to relive the start
And maybe then we'll remember to slow down
At all of our favorite parts

All I wanted was you

{Chorus}
All I wanted was you
All I wanted was you
All I wanted was you
All I wanted was you

The salesman trap

2009-11-11T23:35:00.003+08:00

I've learn something very new and interesting about the business world and let me tell you this is one post that you must learn and hear me out, it will spare you the type of people you will meet.

I've been thinking of joining a gym for a very long time now, so i went around looking for gyms which gives out reasonable prices and so off i went looking around my neighborhood and of course in one-u ~BIG MISTAKE~

People told me to check out Celebrity fitness, so i went in today and met up with salesman mr.x, he came to me with a friendly smile, kind and warm welcome, of course the usual would be showing me the gym, bringing around, and then the interview. He gave me a very reasonable price but its was a one year agreement which meant i had to consistently pay around rm159 each month until one year is up before i can terminate the agreement and the total price for the starting would be around rm500, that is almost rm 2000 a year, very pricey which is one thing i miss out.

So your wondering Kenneth what is this saleman trap? well here is the rest of the story

When i first came in, he would treat me real nice, compliment me alot, makes sure i was confortable and happy,of course he knew i was eager to join in, so he gave me a student packgae deal as stated above compared to the original price which is about rm 3000++ a year. But them after calling later telling him that i was not going with a deal, he gave me a even lower price, see that he is desperate for me to join in, he decided to charge me rm139, i still said no but then i went on to apologise and thank him until to my suprise Mr.x just said"okay, thank you, BYe bye!" in a rude, unmannered, disgusted tone.

Friends, i've learn that before you plan to buy or invest in something very expensive you need to check out a few business things i've learn, its called a buyer plan:

1) Put the object on hold and get info on the product and company

Gym, info on gym, pricing, facility, members, hygiene, location, enviroment and etc (all check, safe)

2) Before making a decision, put the object on a one week hold off before purchasing it. Meaning you would wait a week, give yourself time to debate and find better prices or other offers before consider going to buy the product from the company.

Pricing and comparison of gym price(check)
One week hold off (x)

See now there is my mistake, i fell right into the salesman trap the moment i saw a great deal but i did not see long term, i forgot to mention that to get the special discount you need to sign up immediately, ohh kenneth your so blind, no only do i realise, its not about helping you get into the gym, its about getting your cash, take note my friends.

My father taught me never to be the victim of the salesman, when they know you are eager, they will force you to fork out that money straight away. when the right thing to do was to debate the price, know your stand as a consumer and look at escape option ( how to leave without paying a heifty price) Learn to let them be the one more desperate to take you in, don't be the sheep who walks into a wolfs den, walk in with a rifle instead, ahah meaning dont fall for their trap straight away, they will always act nice to get you in, after that is a different story, thats why always carry your rifle, which is your escape plan to bail out when things go wrong.

So my friends in conclusion,

1) All salesman are cons (depending on situations)
2) salesman will always act nice to get you in then they reveal their true nature
3) Be a smart consumer, know your grounds as a consumer and dont fall for their wonderful package deal and all of this
4) Always plan out an escape plan. Its like your guarantee of a money free escape
5) LISTEN TO YOUR PARENTS, they know best, trust me. if it weren't for my dad, i would have lost a tone of money to the salesman, and i would be the sucker.

All in all, please remember to be smart, bring a parent or a elder friend along if it involves a heifty price, please heed my advice as many of us all will encounter this in the future when we start to work. I pray to dear God for giving this chance to share my exprience, a glimpse of the business world and their schemes, and i thank Him for seeing me through and providing me with a good family, please protect me, my friends and my family from this situation, bless us and protect us, amen.

Disclaim:
Anything written in this blog spot including names of place and names of people are confidential and by no means meant to criticize or inflict bad manner upon them. The writer of this blog holds no responsibility for any happenings to the salesman or places of name stated including physical, emotional, spiritual, wealth, health,personally and etc. Any pricing stated in this blog is not accurate and by no means hold the actual value.

Laws of attraction

2009-11-08T13:22:00.002+08:00

This title has been used by many people as a book title, as a life philosophy, as a movie, as a teaching and etc. This word came into my mind and i was wondering whether it really applies in our life.

The laws of attraction states that "If you really want something and truly believe its possible, you'll get it" but its vice versa meaning putting your though on something you don't want also comes true. In a way its using the power of positive thinking to attract the things you want and work things out.

Many Christians believe that things don't happen by chance but it happens in Gods will and timing. I also see this as a true possibility, well hey God is the alpha and omega, the creator, the beginning and the end. This states that they believe in Gods sovereign plan and will for them and not the law of attraction that uses your positive thinking to work things out.

Today at church i was speaking with a pastor, pastor Wai Meng. I went to him and indirectly ask him about relationships and he stated one statement that hit me, of course i shared the whole up down left right story and he said 'Let them come to you, get confidence to attract people' That was a very good thing to hear and not the cliche answers that everybody gives, he gave me a statement that could help and work.So here is another statement that states 'Confidences attracts people and in a way the things you want" because with confidence comes passion and commitment.

So i am thinking does the law of attraction really works? or do i go with Gods timing and will?or do i go with my confidence to get what i want in life?

In my opinion I agree that things in life do not happen by chance but it was in Gods hand that this things happen but i also agree that things in life happen for a reason. I also agree that confidence does bring about attraction because if we learn to love ourself can we only truly love others.So which one do i see as the best possibility to solve the single life crisis i am in?

Well i see confidence as the main key to bring out in me, I need the positive thinking to help me believe in myself but most of all....A little prayer would not hurt.

That means all three of these does need to play a role in my life, the law of attraction with the power of positive thinking. Confidence to bring out the best in me, something i need to bring out and work on. Of course, a little faith, believe and prayer in God would not hurt, even if it takes a long time for a answered prayer, I've got to try to believe again and not fear.

To those who are struggling and finding hard to solve the troubles and problem you are in, dont be scared, there is always a way out for you and me, if your a christian, stay strong and dont stop believing. If your not a christian, there is always help around the corner, dont box yourself in, reach out and seek help or better still confront the problem with believes that YES i can overcome it.

Laws of attraction

What do i do? What i got to go?

2009-11-05T21:51:00.006+08:00

My emphasis on this song is not the sorry that seems to be the hardest word but its the
WHAT DO I DO
WHAT I GOT TO DO

Because i have tried everything yet i am still at point one, feeling left out to fend and love myself....Left to take care of myself....Left alone to take care of my own problems......What do i do....What i got to do seems to be the question i cant answer.

What I got to do to make you love me?
What I got to do to make you care?
What do I do when lightning strikes me?
And I wake to find that you're not there?

What I got to go to make you want me?
What I got to do to be heard?
What do I say when it's all over?

What I got to do to make you love me?
What I got to do to be heard?
What do I do when lightning strikes me?
What have I got to do?
What have I got to do?

Bruise and Battered

2009-11-03T21:44:00.002+08:00

Owhh my whole body is aching from my legs all the way to my arms and shoulder recently due to sports and physical injury....ouch ouch....one day i know i am gonna hurt something real bad but thank god for my very strong body which does not give way so easily.

On 31st oct 2009 i was a facilitator of the Kem R.I.M.U.P,its a camp which encourages unity among the three major races in malaysia, chinese malay and indian. So the camp was two days and boy was it tiring, all the way from the week before preparing for the camp all the way to the end of the camp, i was constantly working, amking sure everything is in place, everything that the teacher needs or wants me to do was carried, making sure the participants enjoy themselves, lodging, food, equipment, games, the school, Human Resource and managing and much much more that i cant explain finish.

I worked very hard to make sure ends meet, and i really wanted something rewarding in the end, well i learn how to manage my resource human and things alike, responsibility, intergration and so on, many things which teach me much more about hard work. But i really wanted something more than that cause by the end of the day, i know i worked very hard and the fruits will always be just a simply thank you.........but i really wanted more than that.

It kind of reminds me of how i always work hard but gain very little, why does life always favour those who dont work hard but gain a good life? Why should those who work so hard be the ones who face failure in the end?

How come i always must be the one who sits by the sideline when i have changed myself so much, How come i must fail over and over again in life when i work so hard, how come i cant seem to find that love i am looking for in my life, a hole in my heart which i long so much to fill.

I am bruise and battered so much that i myself cant fix and hold myself forever, even as i write i met a right shoulder injury which resulted in swealing, the skin burst a small hole but the worst is the bruise, it hurts when i move it but i feel better after treating it the way i always do with some oilment and bandage, it feels comfortable and mush more soothing but i really want a hug to make it better.

This has trigger Painful memories of how i always work hard but come up short in the end, there is so much a man can bear, I am not superman and even superman has feelings, in life i am always trying to find someone who understands me, all i need is just someone to be with becuase words cannot explain what happens in my life day in day out unless you feel what i feel.

Bruise and battered, i am going to spiral back into my sad sad self again, wondering why my life has turn out this way, how come i always seem to be there by myself, sometimes you feel very lonely in a sea of people, sometimes i feel like a transparent glass infront of my friends but nobody cares for those who are hurting on the inside and i learn the hard way that no matter how much you cry nobody will be there to tell you its ok, giving you the support you need,comforting you, time and time i always had to pick myself up........cant a man have a little love?

To those who have many friends, please enjoy your moments with them, you dont wanna lose them, you dont wanna lose those percious moments of laughter and joy, you dont want to hate each other for a little misunderstanding because people like me are the ones who truly understand what its like to be on the sideline, lonely and finding a way out of it. To those who have found Love, enjoy every moment you have even the little fights you go through because love is very hard to find in this world now, even getting someone to be with you in a relationship is very hard to me and you should not be complaining about the relationship you have unless he is a bastard and she is a bitch.

I am very tired inside and out, sometimes i just wanna be in a sweet dream forever, never to wake up to the harsh painful reality that i am in now.....dear god please show me a way out of this, please just go easy on me and spare me the pain if i decide to end myself...dear god i pray you hear for once in my life and heal this broken man.....

Relax, take it easy

2009-10-30T23:31:00.004+08:00

Exams are over and of course teachers has begun to show us of our hard work that payed off in our exam and of course there is always the same cycle of those who did well, average and not so well and i am one who has all three, haha xP

But to me i am alright if I get a fail, it does not matter to me how badly or good i did, the main thing i am satisfied that i at least try my best and worked hard for this exam, those sleepless nights must have payed off, actually it was just sleeping later only =P

However and no matter what results we obtain my dear classmates of 6Bb/Bm, just know that this is just a gauge for us to see how well we are doing in our subjects, to see whether or not we are keep up with our studies, to see whether it is time to get serious and catch up or to maintain the momentum we have.

One thing we all have to understand is that Failure is ALWAYS an OPTION, yes it is very true failure will always be a part of our life, it is only how you deal with that failure that makes it either a painful or fruitful past.

I can stand here and share I am a FAILURE in life too, but not always tag on my forehead A FAILURE excluding the emotional times. I have gone through alot of failures in life, you name it from studies to relationships to work to personal to family and many more, fail fail fail, no one likes to hear that word, everybody hates it and its not wrong to hate that word. The dictionary quotes failure as

The state or condition of not meeting a desirable or intended objective, and may be viewed as the opposite of success.

Nobody likes to fail because we are always driven to succeed to achieve that great feeling of satisfaction, meeting our desires and feeling high and on cloud nine BUT when we fail, we feel like a loser and nothing seems to work out for us, we really degrade ourself.

Failure will always be there, but if we deal with it and use that failure, learn from it and use it as a advantage in life for us. In other words, those who experience alot of failure in life are those who understand life alot, learn to appreciate life, learn to be humble and many other things but the main point is these are the people who will ultimately succeed in life later on and become a great man or woman for others.

So don't take your failures so hard dear friend, go through that emotional roller coaster as much as you want, when your done with it, its time to move on and learn from that failure but most of all we must motivate ourself to do better than before, to try our best even more.

I can share with you to this day, i have had alot of failures in life in terms of fair or unfair failure and i always question my faith and my God as to why i have to go through all these failures, hard work which in the end takes only one wrong move to waste it ending in ULTIMATE FAILURE! And i always dread the pass failures, how i did not met my desires, satisfactions, needs and many more BUT

If it were not for these failures in life, i would not be the Kenneth your know and see today, i would have learn to be humble, helpful, kind, grateful and many more which only a year of writing will finish.

FAILURE is always A HARD ROAD TO TAKE,
FAILURE is always A BITTER PASS,
FAILURE is HAUNTS OUR MEMORY,
but
FAILURE can be learn,
FAILURE can be mend and heal,
Learn your failure,
Conquer your failure,
Rid the bad and sow the good,
In the end we shall taste success.

For my closing, please take your time to RELAX! Take it away Mika!

I really miss talking

2009-10-24T22:45:00.004+08:00

Ok i know it seems and sounds weird but its not about missing talking but miss talking with someone.

Its been sometime since we had a face to face conversation cause for a long time it was just short talks, very short talks, its like hi bye kinda thing and usually us guys are very arrogant and trying to act cool, we guys are like you wanna talk talk, you dont want to talk, i dont care BUT i cant do that, its just not me, cause somewhere inside of me really wants to talk with her again.

Its hard to start back communication because it would be awkward for both of us, its like out of the blue we suddenly start talking to each other again and of course i will be at a loss for words and topics to talk on, then it would be like the movies where there would a moment of awkward silence, just looking around cause we will be lost and confuse.

One thing i learn is that some girls are not very open like guys who at anytime would try to keep the flow going on but girls once they freak out or know your there, they would rather head for their friends and its ok because you cant blame her if she is scared or confuse, normal human reaction but i really want to talk with her again, it would be nice to have a conversation again.

Its never gonna be easy and of course there will be more efforts and trying to do but i will have to be patience and like a friend of mine told me there must be a point to start and you need to start in a group conversation.

As much as i miss and really want to just talk with her again, there are barriers i must respect and rules to abide by but one things for sure i got to be confident and not so negative towards myself, trust in my confidence and self esteem and of course we must first learn to love ourself before we can love others.

My Dalmation Happy

2009-10-17T22:27:00.003+08:00

If you have a moment, please share a moment of silence for my pet Dalmation Happy who went home to be with the Lord yesterday.

Happy Wong

Born:16/09/2001

Went home to doggy heaven:16/10/2009

Loyal,Faithful,loving,Caring best friend.

You will always be in my heart.

I Love you Happy,I will never forget you.

Dead by sunrise: Crawl back in

2009-10-10T21:53:00.001+08:00

Sometimes I look at my own face
And I don't know who I am
I see a face of everyone I know
Buried underneath my skin

I don't want to be like them
I want to crawl back in

Its hard to think of anything I haven't heard before
I hear these voices in my head
It could be mine but I'm not sure
I hear their trying to be who I think they should be
Why won't they leave me alone
I can't deny it I try to fight it
But I'm losing control

I don't want to be like them
I want to crawl back in

Don't want to lose my innocence
Don't want the world second guessing at my heart
Won't let your lies take a piece of my soul
Don't want to take your medicine
I want to crawl back in

Sometimes I lie
Sometimes I crawl
Sometimes I feel like I want to die

I don't want to be like them
I want to crawl back in

Don't want to lose my innocence
Don't want the world second guessing at my heart
Won't let your lies take a piece of my soul
Don't want to take your medicine
I want to crawl back in

This is what i am going through

2009-10-04T22:43:00.002+08:00

Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain

Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man

Go easy on my conscience
'Cause it's not my fault
I know I've been taught
To take the blame

Rest assured my angels
Will catch my tears
Walk me out of here
I'm in pain

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man

Once you've found that lover
You're homeward bound
Love is all around
Love is all around

I know some have fallen
On stony ground
But Love is all around

Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain

Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doin' all I can
To be a better man

I am doing all i can to be a better man but every time is just failures after failures

Incubus I miss you (acoustic)

2009-09-30T22:29:00.001+08:00

To see you when I wake up
is a gift I didn't think could be real.
To know that you feel the same as I do
is a three-fold, utopian dream.
You do something to me that I can't explain.
So would I be out of line if I said,
I miss you.

I see your picture, I smell your skin on the empty pillow next to mine.
You have only been gone ten days, but already I'm wasting away.
I know I'll see you again
whether far or soon.
But I need you to know that I care
and I miss you.

Love without talking

2009-09-26T16:43:00.001+08:00

The video says it all;
Life might be simple but
Life is still Beautiful
with LOVE around

Backstreets Back!!! ....... again?!

2009-09-23T21:55:00.002+08:00

When things seems to be against you

2009-09-20T21:20:00.003+08:00

I am going through a time of trouble now, a time where failure is always nearby, where hard work never seems to pay off, where confidences gets crushed and lowered, where patience is pushed to the limits, when everything seems so wrong and out of place.

Its at these times where it makes you wonder alot about the life you have now, you start thinking back what has happen, what you've went through, what has happen so far. Its always a relapse, it comes back once in a while, and usually you will always come back with the same answer, nothing seems to be going my way.

These times always come when you are at your best, when you have a new you, a new confidence, a new strenght but then it backfires, down you go into a world of disappointment and failure.

One questions remains, Is there any hope for people like me?

We keep the positive energy, we strive on postive strenght but we have our limits and we fall down tired of the fight, its times like these where we really need love and support because it is at these times no one fully understands the pain we go through.

I Hope things will be better
I Hope I can continue to hang on
I Hope I will be able to find happiness in these hard times
I Hope I will continue to believe that one day all of this will be gone and
I Hope I can find Love
I Hope all my hard work does not go to waste
I Hope I can shed a tear of Happyness one day

Life is too short to be someone else

2009-08-31T23:00:00.002+08:00

I read a comment by a anonymous person on the left hand side of my chat box and what struck me the most was the word 'VANITY' and the phrase "life is too short to be someone else"

I was not sure what the word vanity, so thanks to my good friend wikipedia, i went online to find the definition and what it means is

Vanity
excessive belief in one's own abilities or attractiveness to others

wooo thats quite deep, but it does make sense, we are vain in ourselves at times, believing that good looks conquers all other triads when sometimes its better to look at the heart and i must say that i am not guilty of being vain at times and of course preferring looks over personality.

Its true that we must not let vanity get the better of ourselves cause that is what the media is teaching us nowadays, tricking us to believe that beauty is everything, big arms, tight abs, a slim figure, hot body, big breast, small waist and what not nonsense to the point that we are poison in our mind to try to look as beautiful as the people we see on tv or magazine or any other media because we believe too much that good looks come first before everything else.

The phrase "life is too short to be someone else" , the meaning varies from all our point of view but the general meaning is there.

To me this phrase really gave me a hit, all these time i have been trying to be someone else, trying to be cooler, trying to be good looking, trying to be a super model, trying to be a ladies men, trying to be someone else better than myself, me 'Kenneth Wong'

I have realize that i was always trying to be someone else cause through the years of my life, some people have found the someone else of me better than the normal Kenneth wong, thats why i am always pressuring myself to be better than what i am capable of when all i needed what to be just myself when i should have been true to my heart and be my own true-self, i should not have let myself go through so much suffering and changes to satisfy someone else rather i should have done the changes for my own good, my own self.

yes we want to be beautiful but we must learn not to overdo ourselves, not to put too much pressure on ourselves, we must make sure that we are doing the right thing for the right reason.

Be beautiful for yourself and not others.

One of my good friend once told me that losing weight is a life changing thing, it changes character,looks and so much more but the most important part we miss out is a change of our heart.

why should I/we follow the worlds order? Why should i/we use beauty as a tool to get a relationship? Why should i/we be lying to others when i/we should be our true self?

Why cant I/We use my/our hearts and personality to find our partner in life?

A girl once told me that yes they are different ways that people find love, some use beauty to find love, some use their charm, some use their skills and etc but do you think this love will last long, would you be able to keep beauty, charm,skills and etc forever until your olden days to keep the love burning?

This is the love we should avoid, its a love that leaves you when you have lost that particular triad,you will leave each other just because honey you don't have that beauty,charm,skills and etc anymore.

Than there is another way which people find love, these people use their heart and personality to find love. Do you think this love will last a lifetime? would you be able to be your true-self from your heart to your personality? will they change until the end time? Can you use your heart and personality to keep that love going on until the day death do you part?

This is the love we should follow, its a love that last a lifetime, you will never leave each other. This is a life-long love that will conquer all.

Credit goes to Kar inn for inspiring me to write this out, for pointing me into the right direction, Thank you kim and i hope your love will be a life-long one =)

People its high time we get rids of the lies that the media throws towards us, its time to take a step of faith and start to be ourseves once again wherever you are, whenever and whoever you are!

Be your true-self and do not let vanity get a better hold of you!

I also would like to take this opportunity to thank all those who have been there to comfort and guide me in my time of hardship and confussion

It doesn't matter how hard you try,if you dont have it you cant get it

2009-08-19T21:38:00.002+08:00

Something came to my mind today, you can never get somethings if you don't have a certain triad.

Many people except few of my friends dont know my life changing story of how i came from being so fat to being fit and i dont want to tell it anymore, long story short i lost weight to impress a girl and the girl was not impressed, now i am left hanging.....The past will be the past.

So here i was a new man, ready with a new confidence to take on any challenge in the world. So being a man as i am, i did a very harsh move, in other words i played with fire and got burned.

I taught after loosing weight, looking better than before, being fit and not fat,building muscles and getting contacts just to look better, i taught i would have a leverage this time but as it turns out i did not have the extra hand to win the game.

The lesson i got this time is no matter how much I've changed inside or outside, i will always and still be the same old Kenneth Wong.

No matter how many kilometer's you've run, how many aching muscles you've got, how heavy of a weight you lifted, how much of blood and sweat you have given off, how much tears you've cried, how much disappointment and victory you went through.

If you don't have the looks and criteria to match, you cant have it. That is just really pityfull and unfair.

A funny day a week

2009-08-12T21:34:00.002+08:00

EUREKA! i am right now sitting in front of my com doing my usual stuff when my brain gave me a brainstorm and then a light bulb came on,THHIING! ohh shinny @-@

As many of the form 6ers know that this week we had started our so called new format of schooling and instead of ending at the normal time of 1.05pm, we are ending at 3.20pm everyday except Friday, TGIF! So this week we were doing really mundane stuff like drawing posters which i ended up drawing a cicak instead of a dragon,lol! and the other day we did research on whether or not sex educations should be introduced in school,BORING...and today we had to decorate our class in conjucnction with the merdeka month coming up soon.

So as usual being myself,Ken the man. I went a bit looney, in other words i lost it because imagine i have to stay back so late in school,its bad enough i have to be in school uniform,i have to eat stinking canteen food which i personally think is unhealthy and overpriced! and just when i am on my diet and body building plan, i feel the lack of nutriteints now everyday*arghh* So today in class instead of decorating, my old playful self of course came back to me,i went around doing crazy thing,acting silly and just plain stupid at times but one things for suer i sure love doing it,it made people laugh even myself.

So i was thinking, in todays society we are facing stress everyday,little things also will stress us out. Toilet cannot flush...stress... Steplar no more bullet...stress.....sweating around...stress.

as i was thinking back about today,i realize, hey laughter is really the best medicince there is. So why not nowadays in school,colleges, or even your workplace, we have a funny day a week.

A day where we can just joke around and have fun doing silly things, being crazy and just laughing around and best of all we get to enjoy doing it, when its work,its still work but on that particular day we are given permission to act silly abit just to lighten the burden and stress in the workplace.

For example,today we were decorating our class with the malaysia flags,ahh opportunities,i took the flag and started playing around with it, acting as the first malaysian to win the olympics,running around the corridor, acting as MalaysiaMan the first chinese superhero for malaysia and of course acting as lady liberty of malaysia by dressing myelf with the malaysia flag and wearing a handmade flower crown.

I guess my whole point is to let you people know that we never too old or young to be funny once in a while,just imagine the laughter and smile you put on peoples face,such a niec sight to see and whats best is the good feeling you feel after that. So go out there just enjoy the day by having fun, go sillly crazy nuts anything to brighten up your day and others.

So henceforth i declare every thursday and friday as funny day, you can join me if you want to as well, we can start this new revolution called the laughing people!

Transformer 2 is the movie of the year

2009-08-04T21:29:00.002+08:00

Last saturday i went to catch transformer 2 revenge of the fallen with my family in Tropicana city gsc and Finally after weeeeeeeekkkkkssss of waiting i get to catch the movie i always wanted tpo watch this year and it was worth the wait.

Transformers 2 revenge of the fallen was the bomb,great storyline with humour,romance,thriller,action and most of all heart felt emotions were flying from the kissing to the figthing to the dead of a fellow autobot to the plot of the story. To me everything was laid out so nicely, the storyline was very good most of all the robots were made at their best both autobots and decepticons.

I love the way the movie still keep the original voices of each of the transformers especially my favourite decepticon SOUNDWAVE, ohh when i heard him speak, at first though i am sure they could not copy the voice that the cartoon did but waooo the voice sounded better than the cartoon one giving it a more sinister tone but its a pity he did not came down and fight but if he did, it would be a one sided battle as it is already.

So i would give trnaformers 2 revenge of the fallen 10stars for great cgi, great actors, great humour, great storyline, great battle, great voiceover,great scenery and most of all the great making of the Transformers.

Also i went to cacth Ice Age 3, one word FUNNY! my favourite part is the part where they accidently got stuck in this green gas which makes them laugh to death but they folled around especially the part where they copied a;vin and the chipmunks.

Nickelback- If today was your last day

2009-07-16T21:58:00.001+08:00

My best friend gave me the best advice
He said each day's a gift and not a given right
Leave no stone unturned, leave your fears behind
And try to take the path less traveled by
That first step you take is the longest stride

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had, if today was your last day?
What if, what if, if today was your last day?

Against the grain should be a way of life
What's worth the price is always worth the fight
Every second counts 'cause there's no second try
So live like you're never living twice
Don't take the free ride in your own life

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had?

And would you call those friends you never see?
Reminisce old memories?
Would you forgive your enemies?
And would you find that one you're dreaming of?
Swear up and down to God above
That you'd finally fall in love if today was your last day?

If today was your last day
Would you make your mark by mending a broken heart?
You know it's never too late to shoot for the stars
Regardless of who you are

So do whatever it takes
'Cause you can't rewind a moment in this life
Let nothing stand in your way
'Cause the hands of time are never on your side

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past?
Donate every dime you had?

And would you call those friends you never see?
Reminisce old memories?
Would you forgive your enemies?
And would you find that one you're dreaming of
Swear up and down to God above
That you'd finally fall in love if today was your last day?

Another weeks just fly's by

2009-07-16T21:37:00.002+08:00

Yeah the weekend is nearing again but when i think of it. Its just another big disappointment because I am missing out some relax and enjoyment time.

Its been three weeks or more since i hit the cinema's to catch a single movie especially transformers 2 which i've been dying to watch since the premier and now there is just so much more to catch, harry potter, ice age and many more and the saddest thing is i would have to miss it one way or another, its either i have some errands to clear, church things to do or there is no one to teman me to go watch together, haizzz the stress

And people always ask me why am i always wanting a relationship and this is one of the apparent reason because sometimes when friends aren't there. You just want the one special person to share this moments with,you know to spice things up and make it more enjoyable and i think some of you might understand what i mean.

And here i am losing out on all the good things in life, somehow it feels so unfair,what did i do to deserve all of this pain? Having a life that is challenging, sacrificing without gaining a single thing. Somehow i feel like i cant find that group of close friends to spend time with like the group or guys and girls you see together with,they just go all out and enjoy themselfs whereelse i am tight down with so much rejection and not that they reject cause they dont want to spend time with but because they are busy and i understand and i hope it is.

The one thing now that is bothering me now is the biggest sacrifice i made, losing weight and trying to look good and yet now i am still single, its so depressing and stressful, jogging until my feet's bleed, hours on exercise's trying to get that good look, doing my best to shed off that extra pounds of fat all for what? In the end what i gain is still the same, life seems to be the same as before, almost depressing,bored,lonely at times and sad.

All the tears,blood and sweat, all the pain, all the heartache and in the end looking not the way i want it to be and not achieving my dreams.hahhh..........

Well enough of my constant whinning and sad moments because i know when i get back to my life, people are gonna read this and call me emo. I hope you all understand what its like to suffer but DONT spare yourself the pain and enjoy your happy life, i am happy for you and i hope you all are happy for me as well for anything you see fit.

Looking on the brigther side of life, i ......hmmm let me think..................car......nope......nahhh.......too....hmmm stucked here.....hold on for a while,let me think.............

Ahh yes check out this music by nickelback title If today was your last day, really meaningful lyrics.

Stuck in a crossroad

2009-07-04T00:27:00.003+08:00

~*Alarm ringing!!!*~ uhh what time is it? Its 6.00am in the morning, why am i awake?A That's the first question i ask myself each morning and the never failing answer would be its time to get up and get ready for school!

Right now i am currently doing form 6 in Smk Taman Sea, to those who dont know what is form 6, its tertiary education. So the story goes as i started out first at Smk Bu1 then after a month or more and a load of paper work, i got the green light to transfer to Smk Taman Sea and then upon my arrival in Taman Sea, i wanted to change my course from a science course to a Arts course. So more paperwork to be done!

But the whole reason of this blog will be revealed now.

Because i wanted to change from a science course to a arts course, the new procedure as stated by the minister of education is that i would have to sit for a course evaluation test, so its just a papaer consisiting of 160 jobs and all you had to do is to answer a yes or no to the job whether you would consider taking this job.

So after 20minutes or so i finished answering the paper, the counselor came back with the answer sheet to come out with my results. so counting and marking and more counting....Minutes later.... my results came out

Its like a personality test to see how much your scores lies on each attributes....So my results conclude one thing

The counselor looked at my results, she was puzzled and confused with my results and the first thing she said looking at my results."One thing i can say that is your unsure of what you want to do cause all this while i have students come in to do the test and they are sure with what they want to do may it be Arts or science." i was still not sure what she meant then she asked me what is my job occupation, I strated blankly at the counselor because i dont know what occupation i want when i grow up.

The counselor answered back this proves it all, your results shows that you are stuck in the middle,you dont like all the mathematics and all the teory things but you are good at maths as it shows on your spm result. On the other hand, you want a job which is sosiable and is enterprising, meaning that you are pulling yourself two ways right now.

At that moment it struck me as to how come i am feeling under so much pressure and stress recently like i am puling myself apart because deep inside myself i am struggling with my studies, I dont want to do science subject because i will not cope well, literally afraid of the subjects,on the other hand i dont want to take the arts subject because i am not into Economics,busniness, history and so on.

Th counselor continued:" Right now at this moment i can tell that you are unsuer about form 6 as well, you are undecisive of what you want to do because your stuck in the middle. You dont want the science subject because you cant cope with it, where as if your put in the Art stream, your just pushing yourself to do the subjects. I pity you if i put you in arts or science, you will push yourself so much."

After talking back and forth to cut the long story short, we both came to an agreement that going to college would be the best option for me now then there also lies the problem because i dont know what course i want to take,another crossroad. So i would have to see the college counselors to help me out again.

Crossroads, now i am stuck in it,plenty of it, i've got to explain why i want to dropout of form 6 and go to college to my parents, then i've got to choose which course i want to take.

Be grateful if you are in college or have made up your mind about your future because its not nice when your stuck in a crossroad,everything seems so unclear adn blur. Worse part of all, its your own decision to make! no one else to blame when you regret of your decision.

I dont know how i will get out of this sticky situation but one for sure is that a decision has to be made soon and the true charateristics of my friends and family will be revealed to me, to separate those who are caring and supportive and those who dont give a care.

Be gratefel for whereever you are in especially those who are already on the path they have drawn out and made their mind up, thats good for you.

Be thankful to those who have a chance to migrate overseas out of this country, not to say you left us and its a evil thing, the good thing is you left for a better place, a better life, a better future and we are happy for you but please come back with a grateful heart and dont whine, you dont know how tough things are over here.

To end this blog, i am stuck with no solution at hand, no clear path to take and i dont want to regret making the wrong decision again. The next time when you are stuck in a crossroad,you'll understand how it feels.

My advice for everybody now is to be sure of the path you want to take in the future, dont end up like me, making one two many regretful decisions in life that make me end up in more crossroads.

Also dont let others bring down the path you have drawn out but be sure of that path your taking, a few question you can consider asking about that path your taking
1) Are you sure this is what you want to do?
2)Will it guarante a secure and fruitful future?
3)Is it in your interest to take this path?

question no 3 is very important because if your going to take that path because your parents or friends or someone says that taking this path is good for you, yes it is but believe me if your not interested in doing it and just slumber go and take on the path, your pushing yourself and you will DEFINITELY BURN OUT AND FAIL! because that is what is happening to me now, another advice to heed.

Above it all, one thing you we can be sure when this kind of things happen, we see who is those who really care for us and again those who dont even give a care.

Got tag again,oh no

2009-06-14T00:27:00.002+08:00

Kim i did the tag had to kena so late at 12.30a.m some more. Somehow i don't know why but i had a feeling i sure kena.

1. Beside your lips, where is your favourite spot to get kissed?
not so sure but my cheek or forehead or anywhere would be fine,haven got kissed yet so dont really know x(

2. How did you feel when you wake up this morning?
sleepy,groggy,frustrated and pain on my back.

3. Who was the last person/people you took photo with?
Kim,hairy n gene

4. Would you consider yourself spoilt?
Oh no i am never spoilt.

5. Will you ever donate blood?
Sure why not

6. Have you ever had a best friend who was the opposite of the sex? Nope

7. Do you want someone to be dead?
Nope. I'm not so mean.

8. What does your last text message say?
sorry press wrong button,am home safely now. Ur have fun.

9. What are you thinking about right now?
Will tomorrow be any better?

10. Do you need somone to be with you right now?
Yes, that would be very nice and relaxing to me.

11. What was the time you went to bed last night?
12.30am

12. Where did you buy the tee you are wearing right now?
Not wearing one now xP

13. Is someone on your mind right now?
Yes

14. Who is the last person who texted you?
Sasha

Ten lucky person to do this quiz.
1. Kim 2. Yew leung
3. Sam
4. wai yan
5. Jia hong
6. wai kar
7. wai kar
8. Kenneth wong
9. Kendra
10.Ken The man

15. Who is no.2 having a relationship with?
Dont know about his love life

16. Is no.3 a male or a female?
Male

17. If no.1 and no.7 get together would it be good?
There friends anyway

18. What is no.1 studying?
From 6 science

19. When was the last time you chatted with them?
most of the time

20. Is no.4 single?
Yeah

21. Say something about no.2?
He is my childhood friend

22. What do you think about no.3 and no.6 being together?
Uh-Uh oh no no but again anything is possible

23. Describe no.9
She's SASSY and HOT! SZHHHH

24. What will you do if no.6 and no.7 fight?
haha i dont know what to do cause no 7 acutally suppose to be blank cuz i dont know anyone else to put

25. Do you like no.8?
OHH of course I do but he could be looking better xD

The prayer

2009-06-11T16:31:00.002+08:00

Most of our life's we pray or wish for something that we want to make our life's better in a way but we at times get dissappointed as to why that one thing never happened or turned up,for example you wish/pray for let say a phone but it does not turn out in front of you F.O.C the way you wanted it or maybe even people giving away to you.

Well I watched the movie evan almigthy and there was that one part where morgan freeman portraying God was speaking to evan's wife Joan. i'll let you watch the video to explain the rest of the story but

One part i find interesting was when God said if someone pray's for patience does He give them patience or a chance to be patient, if somebody prayed for a closer family does He give them a closer family or does He give them the opportunity to have a closer family.

So whatever we wish or pray for the paradox is do you get that wish or prayer or does He give you an opporunity to get that wish or prayer?

I can never go back to right the wrongs

2009-05-27T21:15:00.003+08:00

Have you ever look back at the past and wish you could change what you've done so that something good might happen?

Well we all look at the past,we see laughter,tears,happiness and many more. we tend to get nostalgic at times as well, wondering where all those good times have gone,wishing to go back to that place once again.

Thats what i am feeling now a days,looking back at my life,the struggles and happy moments i had.
going through spm,losing weight,chasing girls haha and of course growing up to be a young adult.

But one memory and biggest regret that will always be etched in my mind is the failed relationships. I regret not getting fit and handsome when i was younger, i regret not looking my best in highschool and of course plenty more. I really wish i could go back to see the first girl i tried to start a relationship with and try to work things out, i wish i could've been with her, so many things to tell her but i dont have the courage to tell her, i am afraid i might scare her.

Memory's will always be the past, we can look at it be regretful of the past, be happy with it or anything else but we can enver go back to the way it was.

What we can do is learn from it,move on in life,and be a better person in the future.

All is easier said than done =)

The past is a memory,the present is a gift, the future for you to behold.

Answering a Tag! Got tagged

2009-05-21T21:53:00.002+08:00

First of all the tagger is kar inn.I have never done all this tagging thing
before and i found out were suppose to answer the questions,so here i go.

1) What are you doing now?
Watching American idol (Kriss won by the way), answering this tag,listening to some music

2)When was the last time u had fast food?
On wednesday in mcd's with eugene,kar inn,hairy,and sasha.

3)Would you spend money on food or cloths?
I would turn more towards cloths at time and sometimes i spend more on food.So its a win win situation ;P

4)How much do you love your parents?
As much as they need and deserve

5)Who was the last person who called you?
On phone,my sis. On social, most of my friends xP

6)What would you do to someone you hate very much?
Try to work things out with him so that person wont hate me and we can become friends. I dont hate anyone by the way.

7)How much would you spend to make someone you love happy?
As long as they are happy,i would spend but not to the extend of me becoming their atm machine.

8)What is the last movie you watched?
Fast & furious 4...wasn't that good and i slept through half the movie.

9)Who did you watch it with?
Mark and brandon,my church brothers

10)Where are you now?
At home

11)What were you doing 7 hours ago?
Just coming home from school and cooking my lunch

12)Who are you thinking of?
that special someone,where are you? when will our turn come to meet?

13)What is the one thing you are regretting now?
not getting fitter at a young age and failing on my first two attempts at relationship

14)Your happiest moment today?
Didn't really have one, yeah i know sad right :(

15)What do you think is not sufficient each day?
Enjoyment in life,i can never seem to come home one day and feel satisfied or happy or feeling like i had enjoyment

16)What is the best thing that happened to you last month?
Meeting back with laura for her 18th birthday. Priceless reaction.

17)Do you use maxis,digi,u-mobile or celcom?
MaXiZ

18)Anywhere you feel like going?
genting highlands theme park

19)Who are you thinking of now?
Laura

20)Who was the last person you hugged?
Eugene lol,some random manly hug

21)What is love to you?
Love to me is what keeps us together as one no matter what happens, its the bond that links us together as one. Without love we will never have Life.

Tag 7 people:
Ok since i very lazy to tag, so whoever is reading this you want to do the tag or not i am ok with it.

Ps going to watch wolverine this saturday,so long of waiting only can watch. movie also sudah out of date.

TRANSFORMER 2 REVENGE OF THE FALLEN

2009-05-04T15:09:00.001+08:00

My first stylish hair cut

2009-04-24T14:31:00.005+08:00

The title says it all,yesterday i went to one U to get a haircut as i was strolling along F.O.S I stumbled upon monsoon ID which was having a 45% sale,and i though wow what a great deal that was and so i went in for a haircut and he did quite a good job until i found out he forgot to cut the back of my hair.

It was a horror,the front was all neat and tidy bu the back was like a fur
monster,still so many hair and it look
really messy.

So i went back today and the stylish waas a great guy.did not complain and he realize the mistake himself and said he will tidy up for me for free,so he did the cutting again,put on some clay for me and presto a nice clean tidy look for me and quit stylish if i may say,my first lala chai look,haha no offence to anybody out there but i must say i look good in it,hehe,i know its a bit perasaan but i got to hand it,he did a good job.

Hanging On

2009-04-07T09:52:00.004+08:00

You've just went through a bad day, things does not seem to be working out, you go to work/school just to get rejection from friends or you had a lashing from the boss, you are at a place full of friends to be with but you still feel out of place, you go back home just to feel worse, you feel lonely,tired,sorrow is in your heart, before that your car must had cause you some trouble, you might have had some problem, when you finally reach to the end of the day, you sigh a day of regret and sorrow, you wish it had gone better, then you felt like giving up on everything around you.

Well thats just one of the scenario that i could think of, i dont know whether its similiar to what you are facing but the main case it the Giving Up we face after facing too much stress,sorrow or even beating from others that we just drop dead and give up hope, whats worse people tend to just neglect those who have fallen and nobody cares at time.

That moment onwards, it feels like life is just a bitter story to live by everyday, in life we are like an athlete running a marathon, he runs and runs and runs, along the way he might have been feeling the muscles burning and the ache is setting in, he might even get tired until he get a cram, he doesn't stop but he is slowing down bit by bit, when he see's people overtaking him and no one is there to push him on, he cannot take the pain anymore and the race just seems difficult to finish, he just stops and drop, he Gives Up.

But we must never Give Up, well the saying goes "Easier said than done" very true but how long can you remain sitting there dead, at one point you gonna have to get back on your feet and finish the race, either yourself, with God or with friends that pick you up and spure you on. It is not a shame to Give Up in life time and time again, its alright, nobody is perfect and nobody is immune to the Giving Up syndrome, its just a breather we need to take at time, just a breather not a break.

But when you take the iniative to get back up again, you will stand up on your feet, continue the race and finish with tears of relief and joy. When you look back, you see that all the pain was worth it, to bring you to where you are today.

Are you facing a mountain in life now that seems to difficult to overcome?

Do you feel like giving up and losing it out?

Do you feel like its not worth doing what your doing anymore and its better to just Give up and drop everything?

My only encouragement for you is Don't stop there, take a breather and Go On, its worth the trouble.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cB4zdbPiaDs

People,People and more people

2009-03-24T14:35:00.002+08:00

Hi yes it is me again,sorry i haven been blogging in like ages.

Ok today my blog is based on a message i got last year during my spm month i think if i am correct. The sms goes like this:

In life,people you meet have a purpose.
Some were there to test you,
Some to use you,
Some to teach you,
and Some to bring the better if not the best in you.
Some may even cause you pain and heartache but one must learn to move on.
So pray for the people who can't treat you right, and thank God for those who love you back and see your worth.

The sms to me was at first oh ok another cool sms but thank God i was smart enough to save the message and after some time,today i look back at it and i think back of my past expriences and yes the sms really make sense especially last year with spm,losing weight,trying to get fit,trying to get a relationship and it all really fit in with the sms.

The people i meet or the girl i meet help me lose weight and get fit, she did cause me heartache and pain but i learn to move on in not having a relationship (Yes i did not even officially had a relationship with the girl,sad right but i have to move on). Sitting for spm taught me hard work,discipline and faith, it cause me alot of headache,stress and nearly drove me crazy but looking now i thank God i am a better man.

So remember everyday of our lifes, we see a lot people,i mean like everywhere, but its the people we meet that makes the difference between a friend and stranger, and its the people who makes a difference in our lifes changes our way of life. We should take time to look at this sms and look back the times we had, i recommend if your a christian to pray like what the sms ask you to do and if your not yet a christian then we should take time to thank these people.

A big thank you to Unc Andy for the message and today is someones birthday,sorry i cant do anything special for you.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEE YEW LEUNG! =)

Love from your heart not eyes

2009-01-13T14:49:00.002+08:00

Today i was channel surfing when i came across his movie title Perfume:The story of a murderer, i always wanted to watch it cause my friends and teacher made many good comments about it, so i though hey how good can this movie be and after seeing it, well the beginning was kinda slow and meaningless but towards the plot and finale, it was meaningful and full of food for thoughs.

One part of the movie which i found most meaningful is the part where he was all ready to be sentence to his punishment when he takes out his perfume, this perfume was like THE ONE perfume to dominate other smells to the point of seducing people into believing you were the most beautiful creation alive, to the point of making the people in the movie stumble in awe of the smell. But then the main character of the movie the murderer jean-baptiste guarnille was in deep though, after finally murdering 13 girls achieving his life long dream of a perfume with beauty stored in it, he could achieve love from everybody but then he thought back to his first murder, the girl was beautiful, he wanted to love her but instead he killed her for her smell, the one thing he though made him somebody posessing a perfume with the smell to make people fall in love with him, tears rolled down as he realized that it was the perfume that made people want to love him not jean-baptise guarnille.

It struck right there and then that the author did a good job at applying the similiar pattern of the modern world these day into the story, the perfume can symbolize anything physical to attract love like your figure, looks, charms but if the person only love you for your looks and beauty can wear off, he will not love you after you are old and not beautiful instead if a person loves you for who you are, love will never die off between the two of you.

Yes the physical part does play an inportant roles as well but what makes love so beautiful as it is, is that love requires the best of both worlds, you got to look the outside and inside but most importantly the heart, always look at the heart. Attractiveness requires some credit as well but like they say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, it comes down to us to see our level of beauty to others but please be humble when you judge peoples beauty. Dont compare girls to mariah carey or kate moss, please lower your level to a down to earth level if not you will neve find REAL TRUE love.

Also another thing is that from my point of view the only chance for us guys to prove our worth to you ladies out there is if yo give us a chance, be open to us and let us show our worth, if your all closed up to us then there is no hope of us getting to you whereelse if you give us a chance we will do our best to prove our worth to love you, please give us not so handsome guys a chance and its the same for you guys out there as well dont only concentrate on the beauty of the girl, look inside well, remember beauty is in the eye of the beholder and beauty dies off whereelse the heart lives on.

Thats all i got for now, if you have any comments please fell free to drop it in. I would be more than happy to accept critisim may it be positive or negative, i don't mind. God bless.

How to say I LOVE YOU

2009-01-11T22:45:00.002+08:00

Today i was watching in youtube and i stumbled upon this video titled "How to say I love you."

Its a short film but it has a meaning to it, it starts off with a lonely girl sitting in a bench in the prk, reading a book, in tears getting engrossed in the book then a young chap with a camera turns up ans takes a picture of her and then there were alot of talking, cant tell you everything, go see it for yourselfs, here is the link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-84anmYGv4

What really made me feel so amuse by this video is how the young chap over and over again tries to send a clear message to the girl that i like you and I love you but he does not do it directly in speech, he takes it one at a timeuntil the girl realizes that hey this dude cares and likes me. Ain't we all doing the same thing in todays world, one way or another we are telling people subliminal message "I LOVE YOU" but it all amends to the other sex and their willingness to be open but the young chap was very frank and truthful to her, he as open as well but i guess the main reason i found this video interesting is how the two manage to get together just by being themselves and never giving up (the guy was more of this attribute as the girl keeps asking him to go away in a nice way)

I guess its clear in today's world that everyone and anyone would want to be in love with the other gender, I would. There lies in the problem of how hard it is in today society where everything is commercialize and everything must be perfect.

How to say I LOVE YOU, its up to you and how you are going to get the other persons attention but nothing ever goes our way but we got to give a try.

Another thing true about this video is that love changes everything, The girl said you literally know nothing of me, he said one thing that was truthful and real, i know you could change my life.

YO!

2009-01-08T12:43:00.002+08:00

HELLO People sorrry i haven been blogging for a long long long long.....time.

Been very busy with work (yeah right!) i've been so busy with GOD! going camps meeting new friends and just having fun and finding peace in GOD.

One camp really was awesome, the best camp in my whole life is PPBC YOUTH CAMP!
The camp place we were in was very relaxing except the hill climbing stairs to the guys dorm. The camp site was so peaceful, it really felt like God was there to bring peace to my mind,heart and soul. I was so caught with the world recently, yeah after losing so much weight and looking more handsome(ahem sorry i know its very perasaan but its the truth, hehe), I was so so caught up with what the world wants from me, 6packs, tight aps, skinner waist, nicer hair, i was once again caught in the dilemma of my love life, i've rememebed back all my past failures, how i never seem to be able to get a girlfriend ( man girls are reallytough to impress!) If it was not for the camp,i would not have found inner peace from all the burdens i carry all this while. My heart and mind felt so peaceful and in rest, my life seem more peaceful and calm, ahhh.

Other than that, i have been at home, just resting and relaxing, spending time with friends but its the month of january and many of my friends have went to college or NS, man makes me really wish i was in ns but oh well God plans are better than mine.

Learning to drive was FUN. i never though i would see the day i bring the car out on the road, yeah yesterday was my first time driving on the road. My instuctor was a handful, nags alot but it was good critisism,really learn alot from him. We did simple u-turns, how to handle gear control and especially on traffic, see driving in traffic you know, of course i am very kind, let people cut me and one thing my instructor does not like being cut but he nag again and told me one important fact, if you hesitate thats when you lose control. Just drive and control, dont stop and hesistate, people will give way, dont worry.Overall he is a very good instructor, tomorow got another lesson with him and hopefully i will do better than yesterday, got naged alot and really stressed him out, no wonder why his hair is turning white already.

Well thats all i've got so far but one thing great about the holidays is the time i have with God, so much better daily quiet time with him , last time its always rush rush rush, now its take your time and make sure you find God and be complety awe in his presence.

Ok that's all i have to write, i am doing very good now although some days are like augh boring but i will always seem to find something to occupy myself. If your wondering what i've been doing all this time after Spm, well i've been going to 1U alot, i mean like super duper alot in the month of december.I know the road to 1U so well now. Alrity ciaos!

Spm year a Faith tester?

2008-10-23T10:53:00.008+08:00

S.P.M is just a breeze, S.P.M aiyah nothing wan lah, S.P.M is not that hard one, chill. S.p.m what is that? and etc. This is what i hear every time i question my seniors of their past SPM experience, somehow they always say it easy but now as my heart beats at a faster rate, as my breath gets heavier, as the sweat rolls down my face, as i begin to be big eyed the fact that ITS coming and it is my turn now to sit for SPM in just three weeks from now.

Spm is always easier said than done, and i can see why my seniors always make it seem easier because they have passed it and they are being kind not to scare us by saying wah Spm so hard man, you going to die from sleepless nights, frustrations, regrets and failures, you got to sacrifice so much just to pass this one government exam. I guess if someone said that to me, i will straight away panic. Yes Spm is a government exam and most people will be worried or stress because we have so much topics, lessons, subjects, exercise to cover and worse of all is that we don't know what to expect to be coming out for the Spm test especially history exam, where most people dread over 20 chapters of facts that can come out as a question from anywhere.

I myself personally have been studying hard to make sure i meet the grades especially God's grades. There are times where i feel that my faith is being tested as to how well i trust my Big Daddy up there to guide me through this examination. Honestly saying, i have times where i am so worried and stress out that i feel like giving up, there are times where i see myself answering a blank paper especially history essay but again God intercedes and say "O you of little faith" and this hits me on my head as i have not been depending on God to guide me through this Spm examination.

"O you of little FAITH!!" and its quite true that when circumstances seems against us or they is a hard and challenging road in front of us, we tend to panic and forget about our ultimate solution, GOD! I am not saying that we are condemned for not having trust God but God is in a way trying to reestablish that Faith towards him cause we sometimes tend to stray from God and forget about him, so he needs to put in a dire situation where we try everything to solve our problems until we run out of solution and realize we forgot all about God, our Father in heaven who can solve all things Big and Small.

One thing God also reminded me about in this period of time is that HE is the alpha and omega, THIS IS MY FATHERS WORLD! One night i was so worried until i lost sense of myself. So being a restored man of God, yes i have fallen but through God's grace i was and am restored, "the prodigal son". So i prayed to God,while just worshiping and praising him, the song "this is my fathers world" started to play in my head and my Mp3, coincidence, i don't think so, the song reminded me that our Father in heaven create the earth and us, so He is like the ultimate secret to success in exams and life, why should i worry? When I have God the creator, alpha and omega, the first and the last to see me through Spm with me in his Loving arms, to make sure that he plans out a way that we will go through it triumphantly and with success.

Another thing God showed me was that i am not the only one who is going to sit for Spm. Many, billions, trillions have sat it before me and it is not a CRIME, IT IS NOT EMBARRASSING to seek my seniors and mentors for guidance on how they face Spm? IN this time, What did they do to have that reassurance and confidence to pass with flying colors. I have to thank all those who have shown me support and given me some very good tips, but the best of all is one sms that i got from my senior that just sat for Spm last year. She reminded me that she went through it, her brothers went through it and they all did well with God guiding them and bringing them through it, so God will never abandon you or forsake you, if he can help the people before me through Spm, why cant he now? At this moment i broke down to know that my faith was so diminished that again i forgot that God is our creator, our all seeing Father, he will NEVER EVER leave you out in the dark, he will always be there to see you through it for good.

No a doubt that i am going to sit for Spm soon, time to buck up and work hard but also pray and seek God even much harder than ever before. There will be many things that i have to sacrifice in order to do well for Spm but it will be worth at the end of the road, the nights staying up to study, cutting down on basketball and leisure time, but it will all be worth it at the end because i have God to look onto for help, guidance and support.

One common question that i hear from the streets these days is "Aiyooh i am darn scared that i wont do well, i am scared i will fail lah dude." Yeah sometimes i also feel like in that situation but with God by my side, i will not FAIL, i SPEAK AGAINST THAT SAYING OF FAILURE because God loves his child too much to see him fail. And A's is not everything, its only something, we got to remember that no matter what results that i and others will be getting is God's plan from the start and he will make a way when there seems to be no way, all you have to do is to TRUST AND OBEY.

Well thats all i have for now. Please pray for me as i will sitting for Spm, pray for my brethen and sisters also cause it is not only me who will be going through mountains of challenges but also many others. Your prayers will much be appreciated, and of course lets also not forget those sitting for STPM as well.

Reality or Fantasy?

2008-10-03T21:51:00.002+08:00

Well today i was using the computer and i stumbled upon the music video of Shakira whenever wherever, then my mind started to drift into my own world where i wish that i would met a girl that was as pretty and beautiful as shakira and of course as fun as her, seeing that girl dancing to the song and seducing me, but POOF! all that was just a fantasy and that got me thinking how really amazing we humans are.

Looking up the dictionary, reality means "the state of things as they actually exist". Reality is fact, it is a reality that the world is a beautiful place, it is a reality that you have a loving family, it is a reality that you have a relationship, it is a reality that you are working now, it is a reality that we are living in Malaysia, it is a reality that we all have hard times, it is a reality that we all strive to be better in life. Reality is a very scary stage to be in if you ask me personally but we have to be in it, bottom line we have no choice but to face reality because everyday and everything is a reality, ( I hope you know what i mean, if you don't, please give me a call and i will explain it to you. 017-3612220) Let me give you a scenario, one day you are working and earning a living but you wish you can not work but still earn money, but reality steps in and tells us that with earning comes working. For the benefit of those studying, everyday you study and next thing you know its SPM or PMR or major exams, and we wish that we could NOT study but still get good results but the reality is that we have to study to excel, see what i mean. REALITY is everyday everything in everyway of our life's.

Fantasy on the other hands means a situation imagined by an individual or group, which does not correspond with reality but expresses certain desires or aims of its creator. For short fantasy is a place of our day dreams. Fantasy will always be with us, Why do we fantasize? Well that easy, we fantasize because we have a desire for that something or someone but we know it cant never happen or be obtain, therefore we fantasize to satisfy our inner desires.
Fantasy is an addiction to all of us because we cannot deny we have never day dream or go into thoughts. Fantasy is a very nice and happy place, it is a place of satisfaction, it is a place of your souls desire answered, it is a place of our wildest dreams but fantasy can be a place of triggering self pity, depression, lustful desires and etc, rarely it can trigger excellence. Let me give you an example, a teenage boy sees this pretty and beautiful girl, not a doubt his fantasy would be to have a relationship with her but sometimes our 'Man Brain' goes out of control and lustful thoughts starts to fly in.

Reality, a painful truth in life. Fantasy, a place of inner desires satisfied. Reality....Fantasy..... We live in both of them and they both can be a dangerous state to be in, facing reality is harsh and often it kills us. Fantasy is a place of our desires we enjoy being in, but the truth hurts in the end to know its all a lie.

Somehow i find reality to be helpful at times to wake us up but i also find fantasies to be enjoyable at times but there must be limits ( Guys you know what i mean). We all wish that our fantasy can come true and i am here to say IT CAN but of course it must be something logic like getting a good living or having a relationship, these can be accomplish by working hard because reality says with earning comes working but fantasies like flying and being like a superhero, let it just be a fantasy as it is.

Reality and fantasy, these two did not came to be by accident but God the almighty created them. Fantasy is to satisfy our desires once in a while or in simple terms can be a kick start for us, like a goal in life. Reality is there to stop us times of thinking unreasonable, reality is there to wake us up of our fantasy at times. See how amazing God put these tow together, Fantasy to bring about dreams, Reality to keep it in check.

Well i have one advice for all of us, DO NOT LET fantasies bring you down, let it be a challenge to you, let it be a challenge to accomplish that REASONABLE AND SENSIBLE desire you want. Don't give up so fast, you want to have that girl, start working hard, do your homework, go workout get fit, look good and you know the rest Guys, you want that car, study hard get a good job, work hard earn enough and buy that car. NEVER SAY I GIVE UP, always say I WILL GET (insert desires like that car that girl and etc), fantasy is there to be a jump start, make full use of it. remember reality is there to keep your fantasies in check not to bear you down.

Well thats all i have for now, till my nest interesting thing come about. Take care and God bless.

We share common pain in life yet we dont understand each others suffering

2008-09-27T09:12:00.004+08:00

Pain, in dictionary terms means is a typical sensory experience that may be described as the unpleasant awareness of a noxious stimulus or bodily harm. Individuals experience pain by various daily hurts and aches.

Yes its a true fact that we a very complex being has a sure point of weakness, one thing that would tear us down and bring a hurtful teaching. This pain cannot be seen in the flesh like a wound after falling, the scars does not heal like a scratch wound or inflammation, this scar remain forever in our heart and time comes when it will bleed again, again and again, yes this pain is the inner wound we all experience. Rejection, failures in studies, failure in love, failure in different areas, relationship problems, disappointment's, rage, depression, sorrow, the silent tears that hides it self in us.

We all experience this in our life, we the human race have this common pain yet we don't seem to learn not to inflict it to others,instead of helping we make it worse, instead of being concern, we reject out of fear of being too concern to a depressed person, scared that they will just get themselves in a whole lot of trouble. How utterly ridiculous we can be sometime and i am not saying i don't do it myself sometimes, we cant deny that we all have at least done something hurtful to someone else either consciously or not.

The funny thing is how come when we try to help that friend in need, sometimes we don't know that all they want is an earpieces for just a while and not a microphone to point out the obvious mistake they already know they are facing. Its good we are at least trying to help that someone but please don't tell them cliche thing, they already know it all, just sit and listen, if need be give them a crying shoulder or a hug, cause thats what they really need in this kind of time.

another clear thing is how we tend to make matters worse sometimes and i can be a witness to that, once i had some problems with the 'bird n bees' ahemm, not the little brother down there but relationship. I was baffled how come i tend to lose out the girls i meet, so i went into a period of disappointment, my friends were very kind by showing me support, trying to comfort me and show me the way. But what made me very upset is after that he himself went to get a girlfriend and starts to show off in front of me, i don't blame him for getting a relationship, its great he found a partner but knowing my situation, he did not have to proudly show off his girl, its ok to showoff but not right in my face because this inflicts an unintended wound, your giving me a clear message that YOU SUCK AT THIS, look how easily i can get a girlfriend. I don't have a grudge against him but this makes me want to be better than him.

My whole point is we all know the pain that we go through, cant we help each other to get through this stage of hurt and suffering, cant we help these people? Cant we help them with their problems? then we all can live life peacefully and happily.

Do you the pain is unseen but it has a great effect on that someone, like i say it can even kill someone. This pain is already icon by the generation as a 'X' sign or commonly made famous by the band three day grace as one-X.

Feel that God is far away and not answering your prayers?

2008-08-24T15:18:00.002+08:00

This must be one of the post where i will share something i've learned from God the HARD and PAINFUL WAY. The main reason is that if he does not break my heart then i will never learn and understand his teachings.

Well frankly i am not here to write just another post but i am writing this based on my life experience and its not just a story about another guy but a LIFE story.

I was experiencing dryness and again i got lost in the crossroads of life, huh funny how i always end up in another cross road after just such a short time. Anyways yes i was very down spiritually and emotionally and physically, i was not rejoicing in the holidays instead i was mourning, haizz emo kenneth again, hrmphh no good. That was the one thing that baffled me, instead of enjoying what i have that is one week off of school, wee, i was just sitting there and mourning over stupid little things, man i am so weird but of course everything i go through has a lesson behind it.

Why was i mourning and feeling down? Well cause yet again these 'voices' came and slap me to tell me to look at what i have and literally pulling me down and tell me that i am a nobody, questioning me How come God has not give you what you have asked for? How come he ha not answered your prayer that is your heart desires? I was shock as yes its true, all the questions end up being answered yes He has not answered anything, so i went into mourning, knowing no hope, and whats worse was i am suppose to be getting ready for a spiritual battle soon with the church and here i was a soldier of God wearing down my armor and quitting, right even before the spiritual battle has begun, losing hope when i know that the battle has been already won because we have God by our side.

Then i went no mourning the whole week then on friday night thanks to my youth group, as they were praying and just worshiping God, making sure they are ready for the PJpd (Petaling Jaya Prayer Day) on saturday. I just could not praise God anymore cause i have lost all my hope and faith in him. Then later i was so sad that i went on breaking down outside of the prayer circle, i was just weeping and asking God what has happen to me, what have i become? Then they called me back and prayed for me and WAOO OUR GOD IS REALLY AN AWESOME GOD!!! he forgive me of all my sins, and cured me, bringing me back to his arms again and just taking me back like the prodigal son, its was very touching and life changing.

The reason why i felt so lost and alone, thinking that the Lord has abandon and not answering my prayer is because I was too far ahead of him, he is at point 1, i am already gang huo want to go ahead to point 2, so he has to pull me back to point 1 again, again i forgot to yield my all to him, again i failed by taking the drivers whell and driving ahead in full speed, now thats where patient comes into practice, we have to be patient with God with whatever he provides us with.

Also i learned that God did not answered my prayers because i am not ready for whatever i have prayed for, because i have not put into practice what i have learnt from the word and thus if answering my prayer just like that and seeing that i am not ready for it, it will just kill me.

So two things to learn whenever you fell like this situation i am in:

1)Always be patient and strong, shut out the voices of the devil that tell you things that are not true because you are the SON of GOD, he knows you by name and he has great plans for you even if you feel that you have nothing, OHH believe you have everything that is IN GOD.

2) Slap yourself awake and start being a christian wherever you are, be a shining light and be a cheerful person or whatever God has called you to be and whatever you have prayed for will come to you in time, trust me on this one. *winks*

What is wrong with having BGR?

2008-08-22T14:34:00.002+08:00

I came across many people not you nice people but others who tell me that BGR is no good, its a waste of time, its bad for the young.

I been thinking that people should not look at BGR(boy-girl relationship) in a bad way only, there is always two ways at looking at things, take for example TV, the good thing is it keeps you entertained and up to date with the latest news, the bad thing its addicting and you must filter what tv shows to you.

Well same thing as looking at BGR, there is two ways at looking at it, well let me start off with the BAD part since everyone i've come across not you nice readers tell me its so called "BAD" True BGR is also bad, ok i hate using te word bad, let me say this again. True BGR is not good for us, there is a few bad point about it. Well, from my point of view, not following others, here goes:

1) It can end up being the main cause of depression
2) It requires commitment and responsibility
3) It can be addictive to some like those lovely dovy times
4) It may affect ur studies, maybe cannot study cause thiking too much about the girl, haha
5) Sometimes there are little fights which are sometimes memorable and sometimes hurting

Well that is all that i can think off but please forgive me if any of these is not right as i am looking it at my point of view.

Moving on BGR also have some good in it, let us see:

1) You understand the opposite sex better
2) You learn about responsibility
3) You learn about patience and being the man
4) You become more appreciative of things around you but mostly HER
5) You somehow feel happy to know that there is someone special there for you
6) You are happy to know someones love and care for you and vice versa
7) You become a changed man
8) It might become the motivation to become a better person
9) You understand how to handle people better
and many more but of course again, this is from my point of view, so please forgive me if there is anything wrong.

Well then i hope this can make you think a while that you cant always look at things in a bad ways except those that can kill you like smoking, alcohol, sex before marriage, all these bad thing. they are BAD from the beggining.

Always remember, we can be very easily manipulated, if one day someone came up to you and told you that that guy VERY bad, no good. You mihgt be saying oh yeah i did not know and then your go on gossiping about bad things which he never did or is going to do. So next time before just falling for people's saying, stop and think, look at things in two ways, find out the truth behind it like i did.

We should all practice this. LOOK THINGS AT TWO WAYS.

LIfe is like dancing with cinderella

2008-08-18T11:16:00.003+08:00

Morning its monday morning and something interesting i found out while listening to the song sang by steve curtis chapman, wohoo that is Cinderella hit me this morning on the radio station while we were coming back from breakfast.

I suggest that you on the song first on the right hand corner before reading this post, as you will understand better what i am writing about whilst hearing the song and the lyrics, really concentrate on the lyrics he is singing, it really is very beautiful. Here is the lyrics:

She spins and she sways
To whatever song plays
Without a care in the world
And I'm sitting here wearing
The weight of the world on my shoulders

It's been a long day
And there's still work to do
She's pulling at me
Saying "Dad, I need you

There's a ball at the castle
And I've been invited
And I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone...

She says he's a nice guy and I'd be impressed
She wants to know if I approve of the dress
She says, "Dad, the prom is just one week away
And I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone

She will be gone

Well, she came home today with a ring on her hand
Just glowing and telling us all they had planned
She says, "Dad, the wedding's still six months away
But I need to practice my dancing
Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't want to miss even one song
'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone

Waoo such a lovely and fantastic song, it really is beautiful and it really touched my heart to such a meodious song, this song even manage to make me teary eyed.

Well this song was wrote by steve curtis chapman in remembrance of his passed away daughter, maria sue chapman, whom was only 5 years old and what happen was one day her brother came back home from school and he was parking his car down the runway to the garage and maria was excited to see her brother came back home, so she ran down the runway and the brother did not manage to stop the car in time, he banged her, she went down, took her to the hospital but they could not save her. Such a sad time for the chapman family but to glory be the father as maria sue chapman is now with our heavenly father in heaven. Let us have one moment of silent for her.

Ok thank you, well i will let you know the real meaning of the song on the video by the right hand side, steve curtis chapman will share it himself.

To me the song plays a different role as i do not have any daughter or kids. But i found out one thing that the cinderella can be anybody in you life and i came to understand that life is like dancing, everytime we met someone we are actually dancing with them in life, swaying left right, moving around subconsiously that is.

It is so beautiful when i found out about this, imagine we have so many cinderella's in life, we are always dancing with these cinderella's, the end of it is how much we appreciate and admire the time we spent dancing together with them, will we just rush it through and faster finish the dance or will we slow things down and take our time to dance with these cinderella slowly and beautifully to each song, hoping it will never end.

What i am trying to say is this that everyday of our lifes we do everything we met everyone, but sometimes we tend to rush thing and just want to get it done when we should actually slowly enjoy what we are doing and appreciate it cause soon it will be gone and you can never repeat it again.

For example, like we met friends everyday, we go yum cha and mamak, we go to work together, subconsiousy we are already dancing with these cinderella, yeah they are the cinderella in your lifes, see how we should treat our friends and family in life, they should be like beautiful and pretty cinderella in our lifes, adore and admire them for once in our lifes, enjoy their company, do whatever it takes to slow things down for once ad enjoy every moment of it.

Charles caleb colton, a famous english cleric, writer and collector quotes this about friends:

"Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship....NEVER."

I like to look things at a different prespective

2008-08-17T22:56:00.002+08:00

Hi all, well today i like to blog about the way we look and think about something.

Have you ever had moments were everybody was giving a cliche answer for a normal situation but on the other hand you gave a different kind of look, well that is what i do sometimes and maybe i want to look and think about things differently now.

Did you know that our first though about something will be what we expect that thing to be? Did you know that our first though about something will become either something good or bad about the something?

Well the brain is the most amazing and powerful tool in a human i have ever come across, it can make you change, it can even manipulate you, interesting huh? Well just ask all the athletes at the Olympics and they will tell you that sports is 70% mental 30% physical.

One thing i would like to do from now on is that i would think more before actions. I would like to take into consideration about everything around me. I would like to look at things in all sides.

Take for example, you wake up one morning and you go for a jog, you see the sun rise in your local park, to many it will either be Oh no its the sun, aiyoo gonna be so hot later, aiyahyah. or Oh the sun, ok its morning, i better hit home before i get a sunburn or before i start sweating like a pig. or Oh look its the sun, they just glance at it and just continue on their way

But to me, i find it very beautiful everytime i see the rising sun, I would stop what i am doing, I would take a good look at the way the sun rises from the clouds, admire its beautiful rays that penetrates the blue skies and the lightly glowing sunbeam shining down on earth, I would then close my eyes and enjoy the ray of warmth the sun gives out, ahh it is seriously very warm and fuzzy, you should try it yourself,just stop and admire the beauty of this phenomenon, the rising of the sun.

The one thing i really miss when i went to morning class is this, i wake up at either 5.00 or 6.00am to get ready for school and then when i reach school, i wont get a chance to have a great widescreen view of the rising of the sun like i do in my park, and because my class i not facing direct at the sun, i dont get a great full view of the sun.

Yeah so that is one example of how i look differently at things in life. One thing very important i notice if we take time off to enjoy, be grateful and admire what we have even the small things like a cup of coffe in the morning or the people you see in your workplace or school, we find life to be so much more meaningful and life seems so beautiful and just perfect.

I hope that i manage to pass something on to you readers, sorry for being longwinded but truly i really pray hard that your would understand what i am trying to share here, this little changing of thinkings and our looks and perspective of life can change our life's story.

So i leave you with one thing, it does not matter what ever you have, what ever you do, what ever you see, may it be your family, friends, your cup of coffe, your pets, your workplace, your job, your LIFE, jogging, exercising, walking, running, wacthing movie, reading, playing games, using your com, driving, talking, flirting, fellowshiping and etc. ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF IT, dont loos it out while you have it, this things you do might the same routine everyday and yes sometimes it bores you but LIFE CAN BE PERFECT, BEAUTIFUL and WONDERFUL IF YOU COULD JUST ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF IT, even when your alone, what ever you do, dont lament and be sad cause your all alone, enjoy what you are doing.

Thomas jefferson the 3rd president of america who first wrote the declaration of independence for the united state quotes this about life:

"Our greatest happiness does not depend on the condition of life in which chance has placed us, but is always the result of a good conscience, good health, occupation, and freedom in all just pursuits."

What he means is by my understanding, that happiness does not come about in our conditions or place we are in, it comes with us first making sure that everything in life is in a GOOD state.

Sometimes Its better to trust with God's decision

2008-08-03T14:07:00.003+08:00

Yup this saturday and sunday was a great weekend.

On saturday i went to smk Catholic high for the 12th annual Bible Knowledge Quiz, boy was it a great time, i really enjoyed my time especially on the LRT ride and the funny thing is after the Bk quiz, i went back home by LRT and my parents called and told me that they will pick me up in the station. So i waited and waited,waited and wait and wait. then they called

'Hello ken, where are you? we are here near the bus stop, we dont see you?'
'I am at the bus stop, i dont see your either, which station are ur in? I am here in Taman Bahagia station.'
'What we are here in the Kelana Jaya station, iayoo never mind we will come get you'

The funniest thing is that they never state which station i was suppose to go, so following my common sense i just went to the station nearest to my home that is Taman Bahagia loh but end up i was suppose to met them at Kelana Jaya.

Well after shopping with my parents at giant, we went back home took a shower and then went to 1U, we went to MPH to read some books, i was just browsing around and then i stumbled upon the men's health magazine, so i was just devouring every piece of information the magazine had on how to get a fit and nice body. After all the reading, wahh i was so thirsty and hungry, so we all decided to go to Coffee bean, we had a chai latte and chicken sandwich, ummmm boy the sandwich it was really filling even after sharing it and the chai latte, emmm boy delicious, mouth watering and satisfying.

Then later it was off to youth for me, we had games, fellowship and makan. Half way we the guys even decided to play a round of table tennis. After that I had the privalage of talking with my best friend KIEW SIEH JIN the KIWI, hehe. get it KIEW and KIWI, haha, ok never mind if its lame.

I was still quite upset and down with what happen with the prom date. so I just shared with him and amazingly he manage to cure me and set me back on track. We talk some more and more and some more until I had to go home.

We all should salute KIEW SIEH JIN for taking the commutor all the way from seremban to selangor just for the BK quiz and youth, and to just see me, SIEH JIN I SALUTE YOU AND RESPECT YOU. Here is a true man and warrior of GOD.

Then after dinner, i was out like a light.

SUNDAY, yea a day of celebration and great joy to be in church to worship and honour our Father in Heaven. Thinking that i was finally cured if my dilemma and broken heart, later that day it came back again, it not that easy as just letting it go, it takes some time to cure. I sat there and my mind was just drifting and wandering, lamenting, sobbing. Just me, myself......

Then came YEW LEUNG, a super duper king kong godzilla dragon tanking food eating not more single caring loving and holy friend of mine. WE just sat and chat and it really made me better and he help set me back on track again.

THANK YOU ALOT YEW LEUNG, your really a great friend.

Well that was my sunday and saturday. Later at 5.00 i would be going for passion, any guys going there, see you and lets ROCK FOR JESUS.

Things never turn out the way you want it to be....

2008-08-01T21:00:00.002+08:00

Today is friday and i would be at my happy self, positive and bright. But today was also the day i felt disappointed and crushed into a million pieces, i felt like useless and a loser.

As i wrote i asked the girl to be my prom date and i was waiting patiently for her answer and today was the day that i would have my answer, so as usual today at SMKDJ CF, we had step up step down, with a great band performance by the younger ones and of course the handing over of the posts to the next future leaders. After that it was back home for the rest of us.

As usual i met her outside of school, instead of me first asking her about prom. She straight away answered me and No she cant go because she has none of her friends going with her and she said that there is no place left but i told her that i booked a place for her and because i am the kinda of guy that does not pressure anybody, so i just let here go but she was very kind by apologizing to me and i understand.

But it very sad as this points out something that God does not allow me to form a relationship with her, my dreams crushed... I though i could finallyn impress her to follow me to prom, now it just seems that i have no one special to celebrate prom night with....

I felt very sad and useless and i felt that i did not do enough to impress her, i was so furious at myself, i was angry at myself and all that i've done, why did'nt I just keep fit when i was young? Why was'nt I given a great physique just like the rest of the guys? Why cant i charm her? Why am i not as handsome as the rest? Is there something missing in me that does not work out?

I was just so out and down, so broken, so frustrated, so disappointed, anrgy and so depressed cause i though tht i could finally have something in my life that i would be happy about and proud of, to finally have someone who loves and care for me but that is just all a broken dream now.....

Don't look at the present look at the future

2008-07-31T21:18:00.002+08:00

Today i was as usual went to school, came back, had a nap and then later woke up to do my workout but today i felt very low esteemed and my body is just frustrated. My bod and mind did not cooperate with me much today, just constantly throwing negative thoughts at me.

Well i did manage to work out all the way until it came to the jogging part, ohhh boy was my body really frus with me, i look out and woaa its hot but i would just go and jog, sweat and be satisfied with my jog but today is not the same, i am not motivated to even wear on my shoe at all, after exercising,i would usually just slip on my jogging shoe and take off but today it took me sometime to get my mind straight.

I was going to crack anytime soon because i dont see many change in my physical self especially my tummy, hopping that after so long of sit ups, leg press, crunching, push ups, weight lifting, doing the superman and plank, i though i would be looking at a smaller tummy and more muscular one but to my frustration i just saw the same tummy but with a bit skinnier.

So my body keep telling me that you've been in this for 5 weeks now and there is still no change and i was abit worried cause usually there should be a change by now. So i panic and faster called my friend Albert and tell him my story and amazingly i finally figured out that i was not motivated enough today, so simple he told me this.

'Ok kenneth, its only been like what? 5 weeks, yes you would expect drastic changes but you did not. but dont look too much now, you wont regret later in the future, so just presevere and carry on. I mean if you ask anyone they would tell you that you've changed alot.'

waoo after hearing that i was touch and recharged but still a bit down, so i slipped on my shoes and went to the park. Whilst i was doing my warm up, again i was bombarded by negative toughts, in fact i wanted to break down right there in the park but i just took my time, breath the cool air in the hot weather, then i just unknowingly started to pray to GOD and i felt like he was in the wind<>

When i was ready, off i went jogging with my usual 10 rounds but boy was it tough cause with your body felling detiorated and negative minded, it was very hard to keep myself on track and to just going on. After 10 rounds, phew was i poofed cause of the hot weather, i sweat more than usual.

But i found out that i need to have patience and presevere in this things to benefit myself in the future, eventhough i dont see any drastics changes now but in the future i am sure i will see a change and be satisfied with what i did in the past.

Testing my patience to the LIMITS

2008-07-30T14:54:00.003+08:00

Haaa another week of another month of another day of another year has come, yes it is almost the end of July and i have so much fond and beautiful memories and experiences in life that i have encountered throughout this month. I look back now and say tell myself good job in holding on tight on hard times and of course succesfully defeating depression everytime it arises, haa i am really happy with my accomplishments.

Well back to my post, yup patience the one thing we humans much really REALLY REALL practice, in this fast paced world where everything must be instant and in a hurry, to be patient in everything is very difficult especially waiting upon someone special. But the best to wait upon is none other than GOD, he make it seem so much easier to wait upon him than the world.

My week this time is really strecthing the limits of my patience and total confident in GOD. This week was also a week full of excitement, remember i told your in the last post that i am going to ask the girl to be my prom date, well i succed in asking her yesterday and it seem like the hardest time in my life to talk.

As usual i was abit afraid but i pulled my guts together and ask her whether or not she want to go to prom with me and that i am willing to pay her. Well she was normal, she smiled, giggled a bit and blush, and told me see first. I replied by telling to take her time in thinking about it.

Well the waiting part is the most patience testing time and most worrying time cause what if she say no in the end, what if she just doesnt care at all? So this is all the question that arises when i am waiting for an answer because i see prom night as my last resort into forming a relationship with her, when all else fails that is my backup plan. Well its only day two but i just cant help the fact that what if she has totally forgotten about it? well i can t speculate.

But this is really testing my patience and seeing how patience i am in this kind of things and to see how confident am i in seeing how i do in this situation, am i positive and confident or will i lose out and be negative about the result.

Well that where the beauty of patience comes, the end result sometimes comes to be what you want it to be and sometimes its just not what you want it to be.

This will benefit in the future as now i know how i really react to this kind of situations and at least i know how to handle this situations better in the future.

I am hoping things will for once go as planned

2008-07-25T21:31:00.003+08:00

Ahhh Prom, a day where all senior of my school will met and celebrate our last year together as form 5's and our time to graduate and move on.

Well i am so privileged to have parents who are willing to pay for my prom, it's not that cheap, cost about rm160. But thank God they are so loving and caring and giving their full support.

I have to testify that my mom is the best mom in the world, she is really giving me full support, i ask her if she can sponsor a bit for my prom and she agreed and the best thing, she said money is not a problem, ma will support you 100%. Wow how blessed and privileged am I to have a mom like that.

Well back to my title, Prom is coming soon, its in December but now everything is going like hotcakes to get a prom date and of course so am I. I am currently going to ask this girl, as first i though see whether she goes to the prom and then maybe ask her to be my date then on the dance floor but things are bit hurried when one of my concern friends told me that the girl already has a date, MY JAW DROPPED AND HEART CRACK.

But after thinking for a while, i realize that whatever she is saying is just a rumor and she even confirm with me its just a rumor. So i was calm and wont go into speculating, I decided that i will ask her myself whether she is going to prom and thus letting me know the real truth of whether she already has a date.

I waited after CF to ask her and so my heart was calm, i am as cool as a cucumber, went up to her and ask her whether she was going for prom and to my delight she is undecided whether or not to go prom, Phewww what a relief. Boy was i glad about it.

Then i figured out, now would be the best time to ask her for prom, money no problem, enough for me to pay for both of us. And of course i fear that she would be asked by someone else first and i would lose her, this is my only one chance to ask her for the prom and thing are rush into this kind of situation because i am afraid i will lose her to someone else and another thing the price for prom will be going up in another two weeks.

I am hoping that this time i will succeed in asking her as my prom date. I pray God will grant me this request.

I have only been on earth for 17 years now

2008-07-24T14:47:00.003+08:00

Hi, today is Thursday, praise God for Thursday.

Today i was down and out, let everything out last night, just praying to God to cleanse me and heal me and he did, in fact his presence was so strong that i could feel him hugging me and comforting me.

I was still a bit down and out all the day until recess, as usual i was sitting with one of my friend Albert eating our food and i shared with him why i am not my usual happy positive self today. I told him and he told me something that just hit me as i am writing this.

He told me look at how old we are, we are only 17 years old, we've only been on earth for 17 years and yet we feel like doing everything fast and want it now. We might not have a purpose in life right now but the purpose counts with the experience and thing we go through in our life's now and in the future.

It is true with what he said and it is very real, my generation now wants everything, see a girl you like, go for it. Want that stuff, go get it. There is never a planning or goal set in our life's that some times we miss out the more important things in life than chasing this things.

Well that all i can say for now. But today was a good day to reflect on, though i am suffering now, i should count it a blessing to suffer for God.

The day i cried, the rain fell

2008-07-22T20:37:00.004+08:00

Hi, ok first of all this is not an emotional post, it is totally absurd and mean if you call people "EMO" and by this not to scold you guys i am doing this in a nice tone to let you people out there know, when you call somebody and "EMO", DO you know your already labeling him? Do you know your already judging him? Do know your only making things worse? well now you know, so please be kind to the hurts one, dont call them names but talk to them and hug them, show them that somebody cares.

Ok that's all, now back to my post, what do i mean when i title this The day i cried, the rain fell.

Well i am just going to be straight forward with this, I do cry some times, i don't know about you guys but there are times where i just need to cry it all out to feel better. Every time i cry, i feel cleansing in my heart and sometimes i don't either.

But whenever i cry, it is bound to be hold back up as we always tell our self that crying doesn't solve anything and we just keep storing up the pain inside. By this we feel our hearts begin to feel heavier everyday as if there is a black cloud over our heads.

Did you know that sometimes crying is a way God helps us clean our heart? Did you know that sometimes crying our heart out is a way God helps remove all the pain in our hearts?

So the next time you feel the pressure is too much and you need to cry it out, just cry it all out but please do it in a closed place like your room or even better get a friend to cry with you. That way you feel better and more prep to face the days ahead, well that i have to say today, till then God bless and take care.

Crying is define as the act of shedding tears as a response to an emotional state in humans.