An amateur songwriters confession

With a guitar in hand, a piece of paper on the floor, guitar pick on the ear, mp3 by the side, pen on the other hand, humming to tunes in my head, and a whole lot of thinking, wondering, writing, playing and the process goes full cycle everytime.

Not many will know but i do write songs but as far as i know, i am an amateur maybe even worse but not proven until my songs finally get sung out and recorded. I recently took up this hobby 3 years back when me and some friends formed a band and then since we've been brainstorming for some songs and eventually end up with me thinking a lot of lyrics but not tune. Sadly however the band slowly died off by itself with each band member having to fulfill some responsibilities in life, my heart sank not knowing whether i will ever achieve my first recorded album with a band and at that time it was crucial for my band mates to come up with the tune of the song so i can fill in with the lyrics but back then i have to say "It was not good at all" on my part.

However years passed and i took up the guitar, slowly picking up the chords, sound and music that can be played, opening my mind to the music world and out came a different me, a more alert and creative songwriter with the ability to come up with the basic tunes to bring out the bare essentials for the song HOWEVER! there are more hurdles to overcome.

One confession is that the tune somewhat would have a similarity due to lack of rhythmic creativity and chord knowledge, let it be alone mastering the guitar at a master level. But i never stop to amaze myself, coming out with a tune that actually can be sung. "0OH FINALLY"

Another confession would be that the songs written out must come by inspirations and not by own strength or creativity, a word triggers the purpose and passion, from there on things take flight, but its never a overnight process, it constantly requires changes and innovation to make the song sound good and favorable to the listeners ears.

One last confession i have to say as a amateur songwriter is that there will always be a load of stress and doubts. I quote "An amateur never truly fully understands or know half the time what he is doing, he just goes with the flow, one true character of an amateur" The doubt and stress comes from the uncertainty i have in myself on the songs I've written, i mean who am i with no knowledge of chords or rhythm or rhyme or musical creativity to come up with songs that people will like but at the end of the day the dream of having my first album and looking on at other bands and how they made it from scratch drives me on to complete my first album :)