My one place to lean on became my bed of torns

Today was a very tiring day and quite a lonely day as i ended up doing half of today things alone, well school is an exception because i will surely meet my friends but the sad part is all of them have coupled up T.T so sometimes they do click together as a group but i am really happy for them all as a friend and classmate. They all say love is not everything but if only i could express the feelings i feel during that time to them.

Today I had to attend a replacement school day for chinese new year, so this is norm as its always been like that, we ended later than the usual 12.30 because we are from 6-ers.... -.- !.... But luckily it was only half an hour later than usual cause i had my math tuition to attend after that, what started with four people ended with me alone having tuition, i was very tired after the tuition and the though of going for my usual youth gathering in church make me feel at least a sense of comfort that i can go there to destress and relax...so i taugh.

When i arrived there, i will skip the usual part. what shock me the most is howcome a gathering can become a therapy session for family members, i mean if you have a family problem, i think its only wise to keep it in the four walls of your family, besides that it would also wise to discuss matters in a more suitable and gentle manner, as a adult and youth. There was also an offer to help out someone in need, they went on and on and on, but i was thinking it he is alright, why bother him so much, the reality is he needs to get back to God but why make it such a big fuss.

I did one of the worst mistake, i told them all that the only way is to help himself and God can help in the way, its true we cant leave him to wallow alone but they don't see its what we are all always doing, not to say i am not guilty, when ever one of us are in hardtimes or going through some tough times, they never tend to them, leave it alone help out as much. Thats just what they did to me, i was having a difficult time and did they help me out? one person did and i am forever grateful to him but the rest just sat on and I HAD TO ENDURE EVERYTHING WITH MY OWN STRENGHT! so dont tell me we've got to help when you all know your CANT do it! Its just all a talk to your all, by the end of the day, the poor guy would be all alone struggling.

I know many things have been let out in my blog, this post is more personal as it really pissed me off to hear people tell me off with lies and false promises. They all give me advice yet they dont try to understand the situation before speaking. Love is not everything, they say. Loev is what i need to go on all the days of my life.